Possible PitfallsWritten by Caryl Ehrlich
There are as many reasons you’ve given yourself to eat as there are minutes in a day. Storm clouds do it for me. They trigger a memory from when I lived in Florida and went deep-sea fishing in Key West. When a squall was imminent, we’d pull our boat into a nearby atoll and wait out storm while eating fresh fish sandwiches and drinking cold beer. Sandwiches are finger foods, which I now steer clear of, and I don't drink beer anymore, but smell of a rainstorm can be a powerful pitfall for me. I don’t act on it, but memory is a tantalizing trigger, nevertheless. A splash of red wine on white pants may not trigger an overeating episode nor will car not starting, a flat tire, and your cell phone losing a signal at 4:58 p.m. when you must reach someone before 5:00 p.m. But these things have a cumulative effect, and all mini-annoyances have potential of becoming maxi-eating responses by end of day. You might stumble because you saw your favorite dessert on a restaurant menu. Or a celebration may convert a tentative no to an emphatic yes as soon as you hear a champagne cork pop from a bottle. “I could resist anything but temptation,” said Oscar Wilde. Consider reasons you’re tempted to eat. Highlight or circle ones to which you respond. There are many and they are varied. Do you eat because you’re hungry? Do you even know what hunger is? Or are you eating because you’re lonely, tired, angry, or bored? Think of all reasons you eat that have nothing to do with hunger. Perhaps you eat because you’re up: it’s your birthday, my birthday, our anniversary, or Groundhog’s Day; or because you’re down: sad, or grieving. You might eat because it’s there, or someone else is eating so why not you? Is food easily available in your office, your home? Do you eat in your car? Are you eating because of good news? Bad news? No news? One man said he eats during news. You might find yourself eating some foods because they came with a restaurant dinner or others because they came free with your airplane ticket or hotel room. There’s bread on table in a restaurant, peanuts on plane, chocolates on your pillow, and you think: I’ll never pass this way again. To some, food is seen as a reward: I’ve been so good all day. I didn’t have breakfast. I didn’t have lunch. I’ll just have this side of beef for dinner. Of course, if you’re feeling stuffed, bloated, and not so good about yourself, then overeating is not a reward. It is a punishment. When a young woman used excuse that she overate prior to going to ballet, I asked, did you dance? Unless she was dancing on that stage, she ate too much for dinner. She ate more than she was able to burn. For many, food has become a socially acceptable drug. It seems to numb tensions and stresses of your life. Perhaps you use food to stuff down feelings and thoughts you don’t want to feel or think or to escape. Do you eat when you’re frustrated, disappointed, or angry? One fellow told me he knocked off a box of cookies and a pint of ice cream when courts awarded his ex-wife a big divorce settlement. I wanted to know if she had returned alimony check when she realized he was hurting himself. Although eating doesn’t change outcome of anything but your waistline and self-esteem, you might still be eating to cheer yourself up when you’re down. Or not to feel so alone when you’re without company. Or to socialize: you don’t want to be left out. You might continue eating even though your clothes are too tight and you’re huffing and puffing when you walk. That is part of addiction: you continue doing what you do even though there are negative consequences. Perhaps you eat because you’re bored or have to fill unstructured time, such as evenings and weekends, or because you experience family, business, money, or peer-group pressure: (“Come on. We’re all going for pizza and we want you to come.”) You don’t want to be left out. You might use food to avoid intimacy or sex. Perhaps you use food to avoid nurturing or being nurtured. You are procrastinating: (“I’ll have lunch first and then work on that report.”) You might eat during food preparation and put-away. Perhaps because once you start you can’t stop. You might think, what hell, I blew it anyway. Maybe food is used as a reward because you did something wonderful, or a punishment because you already overate and figure What hell, it won’t make a difference. When you smell coffee in your office or popcorn in a movie, or fresh donuts in a bakery, do you queue up? Do you use food as a meal extender? You’re having such a nice time and don’t want evening to end so you order another cup of coffee, a cocktail, a dessert. You’re entertaining guests. There is an abundance of extra food and all those leftovers. Going home to family is tricky for some. You may feel guilty that your family and friends have been cooking since last Thursday, and you have to taste (and comment on) everything that is offered. Does cook get offended if you don’t have seconds and thirds? We eat differently when we are in company of two people, three people, four people, more people. A recent study said that people who eat with six or more other people consume a whopping 78% more than they would if they ate alone. The more people there are, more food is offered. The longer food remains on table, longer you’re tempted to eat. Are you too tired to cook so you pick pick pick and convince yourself you didn’t eat anything?
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