Parents' Roles In A Wedding Written by Heather Greene
If you're a parent, your son or daughter's wedding day is day that you've simultaniously dreaded and looked foward to ever since day they were born. On one hand, you may be excited that your child is about to embark on a whole new life, on other hand you may feel a sense of "losing" them to their new husband or wife and their family. Without a doubt, next few months will be a busy, exciting, and emotional time for both you and soon-to-be married couple, that's why we've created this special section on parental roles and what both parents and children should expect when planning a wedding.MOTHER OF THE BRIDE DUTIES The mother of bride (MOB) is usually very involved with wedding day plans. In fact, we've heard more than one story about a MOB trying to take over her daughter's wedding. Moms, it's important to remember that this is really your daughter's special day and although she'll probably appreciate your suggestions and help, you should try to remember that this (hopefully) will be her only chance to plan wedding of her dreams. Brides, just remember that your mom only wants best for you and since she's probably paying for some of wedding, she does deserve some imput. That being said, we've made a list of some common duties MOB's take on. -Helping couple select a ceremony and reception site, plus picking vendors. -Helping bride pick out her wedding gown. -Contribute to guest list planning. In many cases, MOB is one in charge of guest list and will need to consult with couple and groom's family about list. -Make sure you tell Bride's relatives and family where couple is registered if MOH hasn't -Talk to MOG about your dress. Your dresses should compliment each others. -Attend bridal shower and rehearsal dinner. In many cases, MOB helps plan shower. -You will sit in first pew in a Christian ceremony or be present at huppah in a Jewish ceremony. In a Jewish ceremony, both parents walk Bride down aisle. -If there is a receiving line, you will probably be standing at front of it. -Generally support bride as needed. MOTHER OF THE GROOM DUTIES Years ago, most of pre-wedding "Mom duties" were left up to other of Bride all mother of Groom (MOG) needed to do was show up at ceremony looking pretty. Now in days though, MOGs are much more involved with wedding, particularly when groom is more involved in planning. -When engagement is announced you should call Bride's parents ASAP. If you live close to each other, you should definitely try to get together sometime soon. -Offer to help with ceremony and reception site planning as well as vendor finding. -If Bride does not know your son's family well you should host a dinner or get together so she can get to know them better before wedding. -Make up a list of people you would like to invite to wedding and consult with couple and possibly MOB about it (depending on who's organizing guest list).
| | Coping with the Time CrunchWritten by Dakota Duncan
"There is never enough time, unless you're serving it." -Malcolm Forbes (1919 - 1990)My son is 17 months old. (OK, all you seasoned parents out there, stop laughing!) I work full time, commute an hour to work each day, cook most meals, attempt other household chores and try to carve out a small amount of time for myself and my partner each day. Did I mention 2 dogs and 5 cats? I understand lack of time. In today's fast-paced, technology driven world, most of us feel stressed at not having enough time in each day to do what needs to be done. For parents, this pressure can be overwhelming. Not only are we trying to conduct our own lives in a manner that Oprah would be proud of (eating healthy, exercising daily, living our best life), and building relationships that even Dr. Phil couldn't find fault with, but we're also attempting to raise healthy, happy, well-adjusted children in a world that most often seems in direct opposition to those ideals. Where do we find time for family, work, personal development, chores of daily living, oh, and sleep? The truth is, many of us don't. We do "have to's", an occasional "want to" and feel guilty about not doing rest. Focus on Your Accomplishments It seems to be human nature to beat ourselves up over things we didn't get done, or didn't do as well as we'd hoped. These negative thoughts do nothing to improve your life. Instead of lying in bed at night frustrated over mountain of work left undone, reflect on things you did do. They don't have to be big things, even little things add up, and indeed, probably did add up to comprise biggest portion of your day. A list might include: made sure kids ate breakfast fed dog locked front door returned an important phone call started a report filled car with gas noticed that your child's picture had a great-looking tree in it wiped off kitchen counter made macaroni and cheese for dinner let dog outside before he peed on carpet You accomplished hundreds of things today, and probably did them all well. There is no use in poisoning way you feel about yourself by focusing on things you did not get around to today. Let Go of Guilt This may sound strange, but guilt is selfish. It takes away time and energy from you, your family, and other priorities. Know that you are making best decisions you know how to make, and are doing best you know how to do at any given moment, and allow yourself to feel good about those facts. Release yourself from grip of guilt and allow positive feelings to take its place. As you start feeling better about yourself and less guilty, you may even find you have some extra energy at end of day or an extra smile for your child.
|
