This is overreaction in progress.

If this sounds familiar, it's because most of us have been in this situation. Want to know how to deal with these types of situations and understand why they happen? Welcome to Overreaction 101.

Everyone has some painful memories from past relationships and interactions. When a person overreacts in present it is usually because a painful memory from a past incident is being triggered.

The person whose painful memory has been triggered is no longer having a conversation in present moment, but is reliving a past event. He or she may be having an old argument with person who originally caused hurt feelings. Or he or she may be reliving an old hurt, feeling as if it is happening all over again.

This is why reaction is so strong, why it is an overreaction. It's as if a wound that just barely started to heal is ripped open, and person is now in a huge amount of pain.

There are six steps to take in order to effectively handle a person who is overreacting. If your partner is one who tends to overreact, apply these steps when overreaction happens, and also share these steps with him or her in a moment of calm.

If you are one who tends to overreact, arm your partner with six steps below to protect him or her and your relationship.

1. Have compassion in same way you would if a real physical wound was ripped open.

A person overreacting is in real pain. Yes, they are lashing out at you, saying hurtful or inflaming things, maybe even being offensive. But these are exact signs of a person in pain. See if you can stop from having a reaction yourself, and instead feel compassion.

2. Table current discussion - you will not resolve it at this point. Make a mental note to return to it soon.

A person in middle of an overreaction is extremely unreasonable. Try as you might, there is virtually zero chance you can have a normal conversation with him or her, or get anything accomplished. However, if you try to continue a conversation with someone who is having an overreaction, you are guaranteed one outcome - a huge fight.

3. Don't take overreaction personally under any circumstances. This is not at all about you.

Seriously - it really is not about you. No matter what is being said in middle of overreaction, it is not about you. If you take it personally and get hurt over it, you are simply joining your partner in overreaction.

4. Remove yourself from situation.

(Editors Note: This article includes instructions for Outlook Express, Netscape Communicator, AOL, and ACT! users).

Has your online address book become unmanageable?

Do you ever look at all email addresses and wonder, "Who are all these people?"

Do you have difficulty locating someone in your address book that you need to send mail to NOW?

Do you know you can sort your addresses by first and last name, name, email address and more?

Set a date and time with yourself that you will do following exercises to organize and clean-up your electronic address book.

First you want to go and view your address book, see what kind of shape it's in.

Mine, for example, had 755 email addresses. Some had first name, some last, but most of them just had email addresses. One reason for that is that I have selected option to automatically add email address of anyone that sends me email (I've since turned this option off). I also found numerous duplicates and people that I didn't even know, let alone communicate with.

First let me demonstrate all different ways you can view or sort your address book:

OUTLOOK EXPRESS Users:

>>Open Outlook Express >>CLICK Tools at top of screen >>CLICK Address Book

A new window opens and you are presented with your Address Book.

Notice columns have headings of NAME, E-MAIL Address, Business Phone, and Home Phone. Note: Don't worry if yours are a little different.

>>Place your mouse pointer at top of E-Mail Address column and CLICK. Now all your E-Mail addresses will be sorted in either ascending or descending order. CLICK again, and reverse happens.

Each column can be sorted in ascending or descending order by placing your pointer on top of column you want to sort by and CLICKING. You can also do this by CLICKING on VIEW (while in your address book) and CLICK Sort By.

Now, you can simply arrow down through each E-Mail address, deleting or editing as you go.

To DELETE an E-Mail Address:

>>CLICK on "person" to highlight and CLICK Delete at top of screen or DELete key on your keyboard.

To EDIT an E-Mail Address:

>>Double CLICK on "person" and CLICK on NAME Tab to edit any information.

Now you might be like me, and not want to sit in front of computer screen to edit and delete, although you will have to do this eventually. When I was cleaning up mine, I was getting ready to go to doctors where I knew I would have to sit and wait. So I Exported my address book, printed it out, and did my editing on paper while sitting at doctors. When I came back to my office I simply went through my edited list, deleting and editing my address book on screen.

To EXPORT your address book: