Making Mother’s Day Special

Written by Marguerite Bonneville

How many times have you heard a friend say about someone who’s no longer here, “I never got to tell her (or him) how much I really cared.”

We’ve all felt this way at some stage about someone in our lives. Yet it’s hard to sit down and tell a person face to face exactly what they mean to you. Perhaps it feels a little artificial, or you’re not comfortable expressing yourself so directly. But there is a way to convey those feelings in a manner that’s comfortable to you both.

This Mother’s Day, write a personal note to your mother telling her what she’s contributed to your life. Make this a time to put aside your differences (or grievances) and search forrepparttar positives in your relationship.

Here’s a step-by-step approach to composing your message:

1.Set aside some time as soon as possible to start making notes. If you leave yourself a few days to work on this, you’ll find that your subconscious mind will start searching for more examples of your mother’s gifts to you. So assign it this task and don’t be surprised if you start remembering events you haven’t thought of in decades.

2.Your first list will be of your mother’s positive qualities, many of which you will hopefully have modeled. For example, is she patient, kind, gentle, forthright, accepting, questioning, assertive, accommodating? Even behaviors like carping or nagging can be seen in a positive light (she’s persistent or concerned). Or you can leave them offrepparttar 136595 list. Does she have a good sense of humor, a knack for making other people feel at ease, a way of persuading others to dorepparttar 136596 right thing? Is she a good listener, a good hostess, a great organizer? Look atrepparttar 136597 way she handles her mothering role, as well asrepparttar 136598 other roles she plays in her life. How does she juggle it all? What does she love? Do you share these passions?

Why Receive Christian Pre-marital Counseling?

Written by W Melendez

Why Christian Pre-marital Counseling?

“Love is long suffering, and is kind; love has no envy, love is not boastful, love does not behave itself inappropriately, seeks not its own, is not easily provoked, thinks no evil, rejoices not in injustice, but rejoices inrepparttar truth; love bears all things, believes everything, endures everything”. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

These beautiful words hold us to a high standard. That is why it has been said that before marriage one ought to open our eyes wide, but afterwards keep them half closed. In order to hold up this standard, so necessary for a marriage to work, we need to choose wisely. To decide if you are ready for marriage, you need to choose someone you can trust, because distrust erodes a relationship, and so does undeserved trust. You also need to know what your responsibilities torepparttar 136405 marriage partner are so that you can evaluate yourself realistically. These two things can be done withrepparttar 136406 help of pre-marital therapy.

Why do you need Christian pre-marital therapy? The quote above is fromrepparttar 136407 Bible. The greatest book of love isrepparttar 136408 Bible. The book of Luke is considered by many to berepparttar 136409 most beautiful book ever written. The book of Luke, as well asrepparttar 136410 gospels of Mathew, Mark, and John, tells how Jesus died to save us -repparttar 136411 believers and nowrepparttar 136412 church- from our sins. “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also lovedrepparttar 136413 church, giving himself up for it”. Ephesians 5:25. God isrepparttar 136414 expert, par excellence, on love.

There is nothing wrong with going to a psychologist, a social worker, a professional counselor, or a psychiatrist for pre-marital and marital therapy. In fact I would encourage you because churches sometimes give only six sessions of pre-marital couple therapy, or group pre-marital therapy with non professional married couples as group leaders and this is barely just enough. Many couples who have received pre-marital therapy say that it helped them but that they wish they had received more therapy. There is so much need inrepparttar 136415 church for marital, family, addiction, and other kinds of counseling, that there is not enough pre-marital therapy. I would recommend supplementingrepparttar 136416 church’s pre-marital therapy with other pre-marital counseling.

However, Christian pre-marital counseling adds a dimension that secular therapies do not usually have. For example,repparttar 136417 Christian counselor advises couples not to have sex before marriage. In his book on dating, Boy Meets Girl, Pastor Joshua Harris explains how a manager of a hotel for honeymooners would run out of activities forrepparttar 136418 newly married to do. This was becauserepparttar 136419 now bored couples had pre-marital sex. Whereas, Joshua and his wife, who did not have sex prior to marriage, hardly left their room!

Inrepparttar 136420 city where I live there is a saying amongrepparttar 136421 non-believers. They say that marriage kills sex. But it is not marriage that kills sex, but pre-marital sex that kills marriage. I knew of one couple that lived together and had sex everyday before to marriage. After marriage,repparttar 136422 wife confided, they had sex once a month. It is not worth it to ruin twenty five or more years of marital sex for one year or even less of pre-marital sex.

If you are contemplating marriage and you are living together, you must move apart and stop having sex for a time until you get married underrepparttar 136423 guidance ofrepparttar 136424 pastor or Christian counselor. Physical intimacy is like a battery. It becomes charged with non sexual activities and gives off energy with sex. Do not skip that pre-marriage charging time. When thinking about what pre-marital therapy is, people have different points of view. One woman tells how she was looking forward to marital therapy thirty years ago. “I thought that we would receive counseling courses about marital responsibility, butrepparttar 136425 entire time,repparttar 136426 courses, which were called ‘marital counseling’, were about catechism.” She was disappointed as were many people inrepparttar 136427 course.

Decades later, now divorced, she expects that marital counseling should be about what marriage is, what people expect it to be, and what it will really be like. Dr. Wayne Mack makes a point that partners differ in expectations and should not wait until marriage to discuss these differences.

Dr. Nancy Alvarez, secular psychologist and sexologist says that some men want marriage with weekends off. That means they spend weekends drinking with their male friends as if they were single, instead of being with their wife. Obviously, that does not work out. Couples should also discuss why they are in love with one another. It has been observed that some people become happy when they hear why their betrothed wants to marry them, others become angry.

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