Her parent divorced and left six of them with her mother. She left school at 15 and went to work waiting tables to help her mother feed them all.

At 18 she met and fell in love and was married soon after. Then she found out that her husband drank too much, slept around with other women, a wife abuser and took drugs.

She was divorced at age 20 with two children. Her husband took their son away and handed him to his friend. He was sent to jail for an offence with law.

Her husband's friend did not want to hand boy over to her and demanded money in exchange. The child had scars on his chest due to burnt from cigarette butts. That was what he got for crying out for food.

She finally managed to get her son back. She left her children in her mother's care while she left to find a job.

At 28 she had an accident. Her dress caught fire and she suffered 2nd degree burns.

With that her self-esteem and self-confidence went down pit. She was depressed. She attempted suicides several times and was given psychiatric treatments.

After a major surgery and lots of counseling and support from relatives and friends, she started her life all over again even with one partly deformed hand and fingers.

Her anxiety was all time still present. It was tougher to find a job. She felt like a disabled person.

The one thing that kept her going in spite of her misfortune was her will to be able to feed herself and sent money for her children. She did not want to ask for financial support.

So rang out scorn of a killer talk show host on a television station in Cleveland. When I was on tour in his city, John Kelly quoted Leo Derocher who said just opposite -- “Nice guys finish last.” Kelly also quoted from books like Winning Through Intimidation, Looking Out For Number ONE and possibly, Succeeding With A Swift Kick To Groin.

John Kelly had done everything except put a dunce-cap on my head as he seated me on a stool before cameras and, despite his complete ignorance of what I was teaching, proceeded to ridicule my leadership seminar for managers, pastors, teachers and other professionals. He held my book up for audience of some three hundred people -- with tens of thousands more watching from their homes, and asked;

Who can believe this drivel? Everyone on earth knows that a nice guy or gal hasn’t a choice in this lousy, rotten world. You gotta be tough and mean to be successful. Everywhere! How many agree with me that this stuff is nonsense? Raise your hands.

That was premature since no one there had any idea what I was teaching in seminar, but they voted as Kelly asked them to. Many had preconceived notions and about two hundred people in studio agreed with John. He then asked, How many agree with -- he didn’t actually say it -- this dunce on stool, but his non-verbal communication made his meaning quite clear. John was all geared up to take me apart for writing something he didn’t understand. He pointed to overwhelming number of hands in air and said; Take it from there, Doc. Let’s see how you handle this rejection. He sat down in audience, as all three cameras zoomed in close -- to watch me sweat, I suppose. Because I knew what my program was all about and he didn’t -- I countered by agreeing with host. I said;

If you consider a nice guy or gal a doormat, a wimp, a marshmallow -- I agree with you completely. Such a person doesn’t have a chance to succeed in a tough, competitive world in which many other persons are striving for same things we want for ourselves. The tough-minded guys and gals will run over wimps in a very short time. I, however don’t think of doormats of world as truly nice guys and gals. I see nice persons as competent and intelligent persons who understand nature of influence, cooperation and persuasion power -- as those who;

MANAGE INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS WITH KNOWLEDGE AND WISDOM

SHARE THE REWARDS OF ACHIEVEMENT WITH THE MEN AND WOMEN WHO HELP THEM SUCCEED

CREATE COMMUNITIES OF SATISFIED ACHIEVERS IN WHICH EVERY PERSON IS A RESPECTED MEMBER

And that, I said to group, is my definition of a nice guy or gal, of an authentic, emotionally honest parent, teacher, manager, pastor, military officer or what have you!

I folded my arms and sat back on stool -- waiting, for I had said all I intended to in defense of NICE GUYS AND GALS. So, I waited and waited -- for John to rouse up from his confusion. I could almost hear gears whirring in his head as first one cam- era and then another zoomed in on me and then on to John and panned audience be- fore coming back to me and John -- for almost a minute. And that, is an eternity of dead time on television. The camera operators were getting frantic when John finally stood, shook his head to clear his thoughts and muttered right on air;

Well, I’ll be damned! I never thought of nice guys that way.

Most people don’t but we then had a great time on his show. I convinced him my approach is by far best way to succeeding throughout life, rather than by clawing and screaming, trying to defeat everyone else, destroying relationships that create friend- ship and love, clogging your arteries and corroding plumbing that keeps you alive -- with bile and acids boiling through your vascular and digestive systems.

John had people vote again and this time all but two men of three hundred or so in audience voted that nice guys and gals did indeed have a greater chance at success if they followed my view of sound relationships. They immediately saw wisdom in my approach and I trust that you also shall understand it that way! The next Sunday, after I’d returned to Minneapolis, I drew my pastor aside, told him my tale and joked;

If you had my percentage of conversions, we’d have largest congregation in country!

MAKING YOUR LIFE COUNT

This course is about people and about succeeding or failing in life, since some degree of success and failure are only real options that are open to us. It is written with knowledge that neither power nor pleasure exists in a vacuum. Virtually everything good we do in life requires cooperation of people in different ways. And every one of them has his or her own agenda that is personally important.

Therefore, you will have to overpower, out-skill, deceive, or persuade others before society will consistently allow you to share in marbles, money, passionate lovers, prestige or promotions you want. Only in this way can you make your life count for something worthwhile.

Of course, few of people who are succeeding are willing to share their hard-earned knowledge with you. Mentors are hard to find and they always want much in return for any help they offer.

The purpose of this course is to teach you how to predict attitudes and activities of men and women you must influence every day in order to keep your life successful. It also shows you how to influence their choices in ways they approve by using sound methods of personal effectiveness. You can do these things by learning and using powerful techniques developed by some very good psychiatrists and psychologists. These methods are unknown to most people, although professional therapists, consultants and social workers have been using them for decades with much success.