Letting Go Of Wanting Your Own Approval

Written by Peter Murphy

It is easy to see how important it is to be approved by those people who matter most to you in your life. Family and friends arerepparttar ones you turn to first in a time of crisis. You count on them for support and encouragement and their approval of who you are and what you do is deeply significant.

Ever had a time in your life when those closest to you disapproved of your behavior? It is very uncomfortable is it not? In a moment, peace of mind can vanish in a puff of smoke and you crave approval more than anything else. This time inrepparttar 102044 wilderness seems to last forever and when it is finally overrepparttar 102045 newly earned approval of your peers feels just great.

This wanting approval can get out of control though. We can easily extend this need for approval to all people we come into contact with in our life. When we want and need approval we encounter this lack of approval everywhere we go;repparttar 102046 waiter does not smile when he takes your order;repparttar 102047 checkout operator hardly looks at you; and your boss only compliments your work whenrepparttar 102048 moon is full andrepparttar 102049 first Tuesday ofrepparttar 102050 month precedes a wet weekend!

All of a sudden life is a struggle, a constant battle to get other people, all people, to like you and to approve of you. Andrepparttar 102051 more you want this approvalrepparttar 102052 less you seem to get it.

What isrepparttar 102053 solution? The answer is to not be concerned about what other people think of you. This can be achieved by approving of yourself completely despite your past indiscretions, failings and errors of judgment. When you totally accept and approve of yourself you will have little interest in how other people view you. If they like you *Great*, if they do not, that is their choice and their loss.

The Boss Knows All And Is Everywhere

Written by Richard Lowe

One day I was having a conversation with Kevin, one ofrepparttar people that works for me. Kevin is an excellent employee who is doing very well, and I just had taken a minute to tell him he had done a good job on something. I feel it's very important to let people know when they have done something good (even more important than catching them doing wrong things).

Kevin thanked me and turned back to setting up a computer. I paused, then asked him if he'd fixed Lori's system yet. Kevin looked a little shocked - he hadn't told anyone about Lori's system. He just looked at me and asked how I knew so much. I just smiled and walked away.

It got me to thinking, though, aboutrepparttar 102043 importance ofrepparttar 102044 boss knowing everything that's going on inrepparttar 102045 immediate environment. This is not only important, it is critical for long range survival inrepparttar 102046 office.

How so? Well,repparttar 102047 job of a boss is to keep his team producing as optimally as possible. It's very simple and this basic rule does not change regardless ofrepparttar 102048 rank ofrepparttar 102049 boss (and actually all employees for that matter). The job of everyone in a company is to produce as much as possible.

The boss must act quickly when anything happens to reducerepparttar 102050 effectiveness of his team. He must be fast to correct problems and misunderstandings, and he must quickly give out praise when appropriate.

The only way he can do this is by knowing what is going on at all times. Personally, I am a huge fan ofrepparttar 102051 "management by walking around" technique. When used properly, it's very effective. It's a very simple procedure. Just get up from your chair once in a while and walk around. Look over people's shoulders, see what they are working on and praise them briefly if you catch them doing something right.

There's more to it than that, however. You have to wander around more than just your own people. You need to talk to other people as well. Call up your customers (whomever your group performs services for) and find out how they feel and what's on their mind as regards your people.

You should make these calls often, at least several times a week. Just pick some people whom your group serves and either go talk to them personally or talk to them onrepparttar 102052 phone (email is NOT a good way to gather this information as you need to have a dialog and see reactions). Remember, these are not intended to be investigations - you are simply keeping in touch and gently probing for any information that's relevant.

So how did I know about Lori's system? Simple, I had talked to Annette earlier inrepparttar 102053 day. Annette mentioned that Lori might be unhappy, so I wandered over to Lori's desk and just started talking. Before long, Lori mentioned that her system had not been delivered as promised. She said that Kevin was working on it and she did not knowrepparttar 102054 status.

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