LARRY, MOE AND CURLEY INVESTMENT BROKERSWritten by Al Thomas
LARRY, MOE AND CURLEY by Al Thomas Larry, Moe and Curley were sitting in their favorite restaurant just off Wall Street having their usual 3 martini lunch and were discussing  day’s events and their client portfolios. Larry:”I had 12 calls this morning from customers wanting to know why market was going down”. Moe: What did you tell them?” Curley: “Yeah, what”, taking another gulp of his libation. Larry: “You know, usual. This is a normal correction and not to worry. I am watching your account. The market always comes back.” Moe: ”That’s same BS I tell them.” Curley: “ I have more than 300 accounts and I can’t watch them except my 5 big traders. Who cares about others anyway? My company won’t let me tell them when to sell their stock if it starts down and they believe old saw about ‘hang in there for long haul’. I blew out of all my stocks last week. Thank goodness. The market has dropped 300 points since then. Moe: “It would be better for customers if our company would let us tell them to use stop loss orders." Larry and Moe, shouting in a single voice: “Don’t say that or we’ll get fired”. They both bonk him on head spilling his drink. “Nyuk. Nyuk.” Yes, it may sound funny, but there is more truth than fiction in that imaginary conversation. Why don’t brokerage companies tell
| | It's elementary My Dear WatsonWritten by Cheryl Johnson
Does it feel like you have to be Sherlock Holmes to solve mystery behind balancing your personal budget? Are you living a mysterious thriller where your realization of "financial independence and security" is a vicious repeating cycle of debt? Don’t be afraid…...Somehow you’ve ended up lost in “plastic zone”. ' The "plastic zone" is a scary place. But you’re not alone. There are millions of people today living same mysterious life in plastic zone. Remember green money? You know, that green paper with presidents proudly displayed on them. They have virtually disappeared from “plastic zone.” Is real Money a foreign object to you? Is balance of your checking account mysteriously stuck at Zero? It’s time to solve mystery. You don’t have to be a financial wizard to solve this mystery. And you certainly don’t have to be Sherlock Holmes. You see it really is an elementary concept. If you ask any elementary school student they'll tell you that you can't take 10 from 5. There can be no negative integers in this equation. Simply put, you can’t spend more than you have! You have to fit your "living" within your "means." For most of us living in plastic zone, this means making some serious changes in our spending habits. It seems an impossible feat to reduce debt while still building a foundation for your financial security and independence. It Can Be Done! And it is "elementary my dear Watson!"
KNOW WHERE YOUR MONEY GOES!~The first step is to realize where your money goes. How are you spending it? This requires a little recording keeping but is not difficult. Simply write down every purchase you make, that is not a monthly bill, for at least a week. This includes every check, debit, credit card, and cash transaction made (if married, your spouse must do this also). When finished sort these into appropriate categories to plug into your budget later. For example; dining out, lunch at work, groceries, coffee, gasoline, snacks, well you get idea. ~Second lets tackle that debt. The monkey on your back will always insist on being fed until you take control of your money and say NO MORE! Make a commitment to stop using credit. You must make a decision to invest in yourself from now on. Not credit card companies. Take control by knowing what you owe , what you’re paying, and how much it is costing you. Make a list. Include Creditors Name, Amount Owed, Interest Rate, Current Minimum Monthly Payment. Add up all of your current minimum monthly payments. This is your monthly debt reduction payment for life of debt. You will pay this consistent amount each month until debt is paid in full. Roll down freed up monies from one creditor to next as accounts are paid. For example: your list of payments include a visa you must currently pay $80 per month. You will make that $80 payment regardless of minimum due (unless for some reason payment goes up) until debt is paid. When it is paid you will take that $80 and apply to another creditors monthly payment. This is secret to paying them off before you die! And, still have time to enjoy a debt free lifestyle. ~Next, you have to write down regular monthly expenses. Things like mortgage, cable, phone, electric, car payment,. Any expense that you pay every month. Insurance payments can be included if you pay monthly payments instead of a lump sum. Some of these expenses may not be same each month ( like electric bill). You should figure an average monthly amount for these. If your provider offers a budget plan where your payment can be a consistent amount each month, this makes budgeting these bills much easier. So do it! ~Now figure in variable expenses. These are things like car maintenance, home maintenance, property taxes, income taxes, insurance’s that are not paid monthly, pet care (vet bills, and medicines), your family’s medical expenses (physician co-pays, deductibles, prescriptions (or prescription co-pays). Go through your financial records and write down every expense you can find that did not occur on a regular monthly basis. When you’re done, add total amounts for year, divide by twelve, and this will give you an estimate of what you should be setting aside each month to budget these expenses. This is a variable expense monthly allowance to be included in your budget as a monthly expense. You set aside this amount each month (maybe in a savings or second checking account).
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