1. “A baby is God’s way of saying
world should go on.” - Doris Smith2. “My Dad knew I was going to be a comedian. When I was a baby he said, 'Is this a joke?” - Ken Dodd
3. “Being touched and caressed, being massaged, is food for
infant; food as necessary as minerals, vitamins, and proteins. Deprived of this food,
name of which is love, Babies would rather die. And often they do.” - Frederick Leboyer
4. “I always wondered why babies spend so much time sucking their thumbs. Then I tasted "baby food.” - Robert Orben
5. “Did you ever notice that a new baby always seem to bear a striking resemblance to
relative who has
most money?” - Robert Paul 6. “There are three reasons for breast-feeding:
milk is always at
right temperature; it comes in attractive containers; and
cat can't get it.” - Irena Chalmers
7. “You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.” - Dave Barry, "Things That It Took Me 50 Years to Learn"
8. “It sometimes happens, even in
best of families, that a baby is born. This is not necessarily cause for alarm. The important thing is to keep your wits about you and borrow some money.” - Elinor Goulding Smith
9. “Getting down on all fours and imitating a rhinoceros stops babies from crying. (Put an empty cigarette pack on your nose for a horn and make loud "snort" noises.) I don't know why parents don't do this more often. Usually it makes
kid laugh. Sometimes it sends him into shock. Either way it quiets him down. If you're a parent, acting like a rhino has another advantage. Keep it up until
kid is a teenager and he definitely won't have his friends hanging around your house all
time.” - P.J. O'Rourke
10. “It is a pleasant thing to reflect upon, and furnishes a complete answer to those who contend for
gradual degeneration of
human species, that every baby born into
world is a finer one than
last.” - Charles Dickens
11. “If you desire to drain to
dregs
fullest cup of scorn and hatred that a fellow human being can pour out for you, let a young mother hear you call dear baby ‘it’.” -Jerome K. Jerome