It's The Little Things That Count

Written by Lorraine Pirihi


Have you ever been inrepparttar situation where you have become so focussed on achieving a goal that you have done so atrepparttar 103713 detriment of everything else in your life?

The 'All or Nothing' Syndrome In a coaching session I had with one of my clients this week, he realised that to completerepparttar 103714 goal he wanted to achieve byrepparttar 103715 end of September, that he has totally neglected every other area of his life.

He has fallen intorepparttar 103716 'all or nothing' syndrome. He has put all his eggs inrepparttar 103717 one basket. While he's been pursuing this goal he hasn't paid attention to anything else. His health and well-being has suffered and so has his relationships.

It's important to get some perspective and 'balance' in your life.You can become so focussed on achievement that you missrepparttar 103718 little things...and before you know it,repparttar 103719 little things become major problems.

We Don't Stumble Over Mountains "We don't stumble over mountains." It seems we stumble over small things mostly. Serious problems seem to begin with small things, and often at early ages. Homes, families, marriages are broken often by little things, annoyances, small acts of thoughtlessness, lack of courtesy and consideration, lack of honesty in little things - small falsehoods, small deceptions in accounting for time or money. The breaking point may add up to something major and dramatic, but leading to it are small steps: inconsideration, irritations, indiscretions.

Sometimes people protest their love and loyalty and offer to do almost anything to make amends, but leaverepparttar 103720 little things undone. There are those who profess they would lay down their lives, but who won't serve or sacrifice inrepparttar 103721 small day-to-day duties and discipline. Some haverepparttar 103722 all or nothing attitude. But life isn't like that. Those who insist on all or nothing are likely to have little or less.

The Green-Eyed Capitalist

Written by Sam Vaknin


Conservative sociologists self-servingly marvel atrepparttar peaceful proximity of abject poverty and ostentatious affluence in American - or, for that matter, Western - cities. Devastating riots do erupt, but these are reactions either to perceived social injustice (Los Angeles 1965) or to political oppression (Paris 1968). The French Revolution may have beenrepparttar 103712 last timerepparttar 103713 urban sans-culotte raised a fuss againstrepparttar 103714 economically enfranchised.

This pacific co-existence conceals a maelstrom of envy. Beholdrepparttar 103715 rampant Schadenfreude which accompaniedrepparttar 103716 antitrust case againstrepparttar 103717 predatory but loaded Microsoft. Observerepparttar 103718 glee which engulfed many destitute countries inrepparttar 103719 wake ofrepparttar 103720 September 11 atrocities against America,repparttar 103721 epitome of triumphant prosperity. Witnessrepparttar 103722 post-World.com orgiastic castigation of avaricious CEO's.

Envy - a pathological manifestation of destructive aggressiveness - is distinct from jealousy.

The New Oxford Dictionary of English defines envy as:

"A feeling of discontented or resentful longing aroused by someone else's possessions, qualities, or luck ... Mortification and ill-will occasioned byrepparttar 103723 contemplation of another's superior advantages."

Pathological envy -repparttar 103724 fourth deadly sin - is engendered byrepparttar 103725 realization of some lack, deficiency, or inadequacy in oneself. The envious begrudge others their success, brilliance, happiness, beauty, good fortune, or wealth. Envy provokes misery, humiliation, and impotent rage.

The envious copes with his pernicious emotions in five ways:

They attackrepparttar 103726 perceived source of frustration in an attempt to destroy it, or "reduce it" to their "size". Such destructive impulses often assumerepparttar 103727 disguise of championing social causes, fighting injustice, touting reform, or promoting an ideology.

They seek to subsumerepparttar 103728 object of envy by imitating it. In extreme cases, they strive to get rich quick through criminal scams, or corruption. They endeavor to out-smartrepparttar 103729 system and shortcut their way to fortune and celebrity.

They resort to self-deprecation. They idealizerepparttar 103730 successful,repparttar 103731 rich,repparttar 103732 mighty, andrepparttar 103733 lucky and attribute to them super-human, almost divine, qualities. Atrepparttar 103734 same time, they humble themselves. Indeed, most of this strain ofrepparttar 103735 envious end up disenchanted and bitter, drivingrepparttar 103736 objects of their own erstwhile devotion and adulation to destruction and decrepitude.

They experience cognitive dissonance. These people devaluerepparttar 103737 source of their frustration and envy by finding faults in everything they most desire and in everyone they envy.

They avoidrepparttar 103738 envied person and thusrepparttar 103739 agonizing pangs of envy.

Envy is not a new phenomenon. Belisarius,repparttar 103740 general who conqueredrepparttar 103741 world for Emperor Justinian, was blinded and stripped of his assets by his envious peers. I - and many others - have written extensively about envy in command economies. Nor is envy likely to diminish.

In his book, "Facial Justice", Hartley describes a post-apocalyptic dystopia, New State, in which envy is forbidden and equality extolled and everything enviable is obliterated. Women are modified to look like men and given identical "beta faces". Tall buildings are razed.

Joseph Schumpeter,repparttar 103742 prophetic Austrian-American economist, believed that socialism will disinherit capitalism. In "Capitalism, Socialism, and Democracy" he foresaw a conflict between a class of refined but dirt-poor intellectuals andrepparttar 103743 vulgar but filthy rich businessmen and managers they virulently envy and resent. Samuel Johnson wrote: "He was dull in a new way, and that made many people think him great." The literati seek to tear downrepparttar 103744 market economy which they feel has so disenfranchised and undervalued them.

Hitler, who fancied himself an artist, labeledrepparttar 103745 British a "nation of shopkeepers" in one of his bouts of raging envy. Ralph Reiland,repparttar 103746 Kenneth Simon professor of free enterprise at Robert Morris University, quotes David Brooks ofrepparttar 103747 "weekly Standard", who christened this phenomenon "bourgeoisophobia":

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