Is your career classified 3F?Written by Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D.
When United States had a military draft, men with "4F" status were banned from military service. Some cherished designation while others felt cheated out of experience.
If you're seeking career freedom, you may feel blocked by 3F's: Fear, Focus and Finances -- and you can change your 3F status to fourth F, "Forward!"
Fear comes from giving up a cherished identity. Once you move to a new career, you have to find a new way to say, "I am" with pride and excitement. What will your former colleagues say? How will your family greet new you? And how do you feel about trading in your "senior seasoned" identity for role of a stumbling beginner? The risk is real. After starting a business or spending a few years in graduate school, you are no longer same person. Your old career neighborhood changes, too. Returning home may no longer be an option. You overcome this block by learning to recognize fear as a powerful ally rather than a threat. Work with and through fear.
Focus requires you to choose a meaningful goal and then to avoid siren call of your previous life. If you have wisely chosen to remain in a job while exploring your options, you must resist getting caught up in politics and reward system of a world where you are no longer a citizen. You may need to find inner resources to keep going, while sustaining motivation and excitement of your new world.
You Deserve a Love Like ThisWritten by Rinatta Paries
I once participated in a small workshop on public speaking. Each of us was presented with goal of deeply connecting with all eight attendees. We were to speak from heart on a specific topic, and audience was to connect back with speaker. And while workshop was indeed interesting, what really grabbed my attention was a married couple who also participated in it. These two demonstrated type of love connection we all deserve.
Both husband and wife made a definite connection with everyone in room when it was their individual turn to speak. As husband began his speech, he looked at his wife in audience and magic happened. His eyes darkened. They filled with a mixture of profound love, passion and gratitude for her. He breathed deeper. He stood straighter. He became even more present.
It was as though admiration and love he saw in his wife's eyes fed him strength and permission to be more present; as if she saw him and accepted him so completely that acceptance from everyone else was a given.
When it was his wife's turn to speak, same thing happened between them. This time, he fed her with acceptance and delight in her. And she in turn, having permission, could be fully herself in front of a group of strangers.
These two were ordinary people, both young, perhaps in their early 30's. She is a stay-at-home mom with a 2-year-old. He is a working professional. But love, connection and acceptance between them is nothing ordinary.
What they have is true love. Not passion that ignites at first sight and hurls two people into drama of a shaky relationship. Not comfort of some couples, having been together for many years, no longer seeing or caring much about each other. Not thrill of two people having an affair behind their partners' backs. This couple is truly in love.