Is it Perfunctory of Desultory? It Pays to Know the Difference.

Part of Emotional Intelligence is being able to label emotions and therefore attitudes, and in workplace, these lead to motivation and performance. It’s important to understand distinction between desultory, and perfunctory when dealing with an employee or colleague. Desultory is far more pervasive and permanent and probably has to do with general atmosphere of office, while anyone can do a single task in a perfunctory manner, if they dislike it, or are having an off day, or don’t feel good.

If you have a desultory work environment, you’re going to need to work on culture and general atmosphere. If you have an employee doing a perfunctory job at a certain task, you need to correct for that situation only.

In essence, any person can lack motivation for a certain task, but when attitude is desultory, no one is motivated.

Definitions

Desultory - Desultory comes from Latin desultorius which literally means a circus rider who leaps from horse to horse. Desultory means (1) marked by lack of definite plan, regularity, or purpose; (2) not connected with main subject, and (3) disappointing in progress or performance (sluggish). Perfunctory - Perfunctory is from Latin perfunctorius meaning to accomplish or get through with. However in modern connotations, it has come to mean (1) characterized by routine or superficiality (mechanical); or (2) lacking in interest or enthusiasm.

The Fastest Way to Ruin Yourself

I don’t know many people who would admit to wanting to ruin themselves, but there are a lot of people who are doing everything they can to accomplish that very goal. They certainly don’t see it that way, but if you look at way they live, you can see it happening. I knew a man who was very strict on his daughter. This strictness was more than simple discipline. He felt he had to control every part of her life. And, of course, he never liked any of her boyfriends. While his daughter was young he could get away with being an “all controlling” parent. The sad part of this was that he thought he was being a good parent. It is certainly every parent’s responsibility to protect and discipline their children. But it must always be for purpose of helping them grow up to make good decisions on their own - not simply to dominate. As will happen in every case, there came a time when girl grew old enough to get out from under dominance of her dad and make her own way. When she did, she ended up marrying very kind of guy her dad despised. Not only that, but resentment that had built up in her life caused her to move away from him and not even speak to him for years at time. Now, I don’t know whether or not she consciously did all of this for spite, but result was that her dad was devastated. In spite of his wrong actions and attitudes, he still loved his daughter very much, and years of alienation were a torture that ruined his health and other areas of his life as he let it “get to him.” This father did a destructive thing, in his parenting. But parenting is not only place that this happens. Many people do it in other areas of life and result is same - personal ruin. It happens when individuals try to live another person’s life for them. Whether it is as a parent, an employer, a spouse, or any other relationship you operate in, you cannot live another person’s life for them. This is probably fastest ways to self-ruin that exists on planet today.