When I first started getting active in creative real estate, my skill set at negotiating was very weak. I had done telemarketing thing for American Express as a financial planner and had studied and learned a few techniques. On surface one might think that would be a perfect tie-in to talking to sellers about their properties and their financial situation. I can promise you it wasn't.Yes, I did pick up asking general sales techniques like neverasking close-ended ("yes" or "no" answers) questions. Also, it still works to ask multiple choice assumptive questions like "Would Tuesday at 6 p.m. or Thursday at 3 p.m. work better for you?". The basics were not enough.
When I first began asking sellers what their loan balance was, I may have actually received a number for an answer 50% of time. I had two major obstacles facing me.
First, my belief system was cock-eyed in that having come from a financial/accountant type background, I knew without a shadow of a doubt that no one would ever just give me their house and that only a complete fool would tell me balance remaining on their loan.
Second, I didn't have a clue as to right way to ask and I can tell you from experience that it matters greatly.
The first obstacle, belief system, was easily overcome after I met my first truly motivated seller. Okay, beliefs systems are trashed and I must be complete fool because that was way too easy.
The second obstacle, phraseology/negotiating, is no longer an obstacle, per se, but it is still a skill that I continually try to improve upon. The two key components, assuming you have already properly established good rapport, are timing and phrases you use.
Here are some quick examples of how NOT to ask a seller what loan balance is:
What do you owe? Are you willing to sell it for what you owe? How much equity would you say you have? etc., etc.
Now, don't get me wrong. If you use these phrases and similar ones enough times and with enough confidence, you will be able to get a numerical answer on occasion (as opposed to some of not so friendly responses I received early on).
Contrast above phrases to these:
How much is left on loan? So, property's not owned free and clear? etc., etc.
The first set of questions personalizes issue and attaches debt, and thus problem, with seller. The second set of questions creates detachment and since it's no longer "their debt" or "their problem" or "what they owe", it's just simply a number and not a problem to share.
Since I first picked up on this one little tactic, I would estimate I get all information I want on 99 out of 100 calls with almost no real effort. Granted, it does take time and practice to develop decent phone skills. The ability to naturally create rapport and flow with call, yet still get information you want will come with time. My point is that it's important to begin testing and tracking different approaches. If you do this, you will notice some very interesting results.