Hearing vs. Listening

Written by Susan Dunn, MA, the EQ Coach


DEFINITIONS

Hearing - To perceive or apprehend byrepparttar ear; to gain knowledge of by hearing; to listen to with attention. Listening - To pay attention to sound; to hear something with thoughtful attention; to give consideration; to be alert to catch an unexpected sound.

COMPARISONS

To really key in to whatrepparttar 101617 person is saying and not saying. To look forrepparttar 101618 meaning andrepparttar 101619 feelings behind what is being said. To go beyondrepparttar 101620 words. Giving your deepest level of attention. vs. Simply receivingrepparttar 101621 words which can become only "sounds". Not trying to understand, ot get belowrepparttar 101622 surfce. Giving only peremptory attention. Not absorbing feelings or taking in any new information.

EXAMPLE

Mary sat and let Nancy explainrepparttar 101623 new project she wanted to initiate, but Mary's mind was already made up. She had made up her mind beforehand she didn't want to do and had closed her mind. She just sat and let Nancy explain as a matter of courtesy, but didn't take in any new information. She had already decided to say "no".

Being Optimistic v. Wearing Rose-Colored Glasses

Written by Susan Dunn, MA, Emotional Intelligence Coach


DEFINITIONS

Being optimistic - Believingrepparttar doctrine that this world isrepparttar 101616 best possible world; having an inclination to putrepparttar 101617 most favorable construction upon actions and events or to anticipaterepparttar 101618 best possible outcome

Rose-colored glasses - Puttingrepparttar 101619 most favorable construction upon actions events and people and expectingrepparttar 101620 best possible outcome when common sense dictates this isn't possible orrepparttar 101621 reality is that it isn't happening. Refusing to take action when you should and just hoping forrepparttar 101622 best. Denying what you're experiencing.

COMPARISONS

Taking action to make things change vs. Hoping things will change

Demanding respect vs. Wishing someone would treat you better

Making your dreams come true vs. Just dreaming

EXAMPLE

Randolph approached his sales job with optimism and enthusiasm. He expected to close sales and didn't let rejection get him down. He considered each rejection one step closer to a sale. If he didn't get a sale, or had a big disappointment, he distracted himself, did something fun, and didn't consider it anything personal about himself or his capabilities. Then he tried again. He attributed a failure to something not personal, not permanent, and not pervasive. He had an optimistic attitude, especially in performance situations, but he worked on his skills too. He was in touch with reality.

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