HOW TO SAVE YOUR MARRIAGE

Written by Kaveh Nayeri, MS,


Getting married (or beginning an intimate relationship) is, in a way, like starting a business you’ve always wanted to own or a university program you’ve always wanted to enter.

It may be relatively easy to begin but it is almost guaranteed to be very challenging to stay with it forrepparttar long-term and make it a success.

Which one do you think is harder? Being successful in your marriage? In your education? Or in your career?

They are all challenging to achieve for most of us. Yet they are also goals that most of us pursue or dream about. Not everybody wants to get married but most adults want to have some form of love relationship that feels good and is right for them. Andrepparttar 130230 topics in this article apply to all intimate and significant relationships, not just marriages.

Indeedrepparttar 130231 drive to form and maintain a successful love relationship seems to be consistently strong in most adults. And I have observed this repeatedly in my work as individual and couples therapist.

Atrepparttar 130232 same time our 50 % + divorce rate clearly communicatesrepparttar 130233 message that making our love relationship last and flourish is difficult. If we add torepparttar 130234 high occurrences of divorce,repparttar 130235 numerous unhappy marriages out there in whichrepparttar 130236 partners feel hopelessly stuck my point becomes even more clear.

In my work as a mental health clinician I have seen marital and relationship discord often. And as a husband in an 11-year marriage I have feltrepparttar 130237 severe pains of marital crisis.

Alongrepparttar 130238 way I have formed some wisdom on ways to understand, preserve, and improve your marriage. I teach these in a workshop called “All About Love” and will present them in this article. Also you can log onto my website at www.loveyoursoul.com for additional information.

Please keep in mind that most ofrepparttar 130239 advice I am providing below apply and are suggested to both you and your partner even if I do not always mention him or her. However inrepparttar 130240 event that your significant other is not willing to follow this advice, I suggest that you do them on your own and invite your partner to join you as soon as possible.

1. EXPECT RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS

All or most marriages run into small and large problems eventually. Some marital problems can be anticipated and avoided. Others cannot be foreseen and must be faced, worked through, and resolved by both partners.

Marital crisis is often very painful to go through. But that does not mean thatrepparttar 130241 marriage should be ended.

Conflicts are often tests ofrepparttar 130242 strength ofrepparttar 130243 love relationship. These are tests that both partners must take and pass beforerepparttar 130244 marriage can graduate to a higher level of mutual satisfaction.

Your marital problem should tell you that there are some things that you have not understood about your partner and vice versa. You may also have lost hope forrepparttar 130245 relationship and neglected each other’s needs.

There is work to be done by each of you. It will probably be hard work but it is also required work to help resolve your marital conflict and for each of you to grow personally.

2. OBTAIN OUTSIDE HELP

The pain and complexity of marital crisis often handicaprepparttar 130246 couples’ ability to resolverepparttar 130247 problem on their own. It is important that you start receiving couples counseling soon afterrepparttar 130248 crisis begins becauserepparttar 130249 longer you waitrepparttar 130250 more difficult it will be to saverepparttar 130251 marriage. You should treatrepparttar 130252 crisis as a relationship emergency and act right away to get allrepparttar 130253 help you need.

It is important that you find a therapist who hasrepparttar 130254 experience, knowledge, and motivation to treat marital problems. Also you and your partner should collaborate in order to choose a therapist who seems right for treating your marriage.

Also there are many organizations that provide relationship services. You can locate them throughrepparttar 130255 internet,repparttar 130256 phone book, your church, etc. I likerepparttar 130257 services advertised onrepparttar 130258 websites: imagorelationships.com and embracemarriage.com .

In addition you can request help from mature friends or relatives that you trust. Their help can be valuable and may include sharing their own experiences with marital problems, listening to you, or offering other support.

Rules to live life by....

Written by khushi k


How often have we heard ourselves complaining about how unlucky we are in life or how things are just not working out right for us. However, what we so easily forget is that at some time before in lives, luck has favoured us.But it is human nature whereby we remember only what didn’t work for us but easily forgetrepparttar things that happened in our favour. There are several things in life that we must cherish and be thankful to God for. One important thing that we must do is make a list of allrepparttar 130228 good things that have happened to us or allrepparttar 130229 blessings we have got and refer to that list whenever we feel upset or uncared for. Actually this isrepparttar 130230 same logic, which we use when we read old love letters because they remind us of happy times and cherished memories. Here is a list of ten quotations and how we can interpret these to lead a happier life. 1) Cry a river; build a bridge; get over it. Let go of past failures, sadness and people whom we remember but who no longer care for us. This sounds so easy but its easier said than done. We all have gone through our share of heartaches and sadness. But when we constantly rememberrepparttar 130231 pain and suffering we had endured, we are allowing that sadness to gain an upper hand over us. What we must realize is that what has happened, has happened. Its over and done with. People change and times change. Moving on in life is very but it’srepparttar 130232 first constructive step to a better you. 2) Everything happens in its own time. There are things that we do and expect to be rewarded for which does not happen. In offices there might be a promotion that we might have wanted, a high percentage of marks in a test or a job offer that we were sure that was to be given to us etc that never worked out. At such times we lose perspective and blame our luck and become despondent. We need to realize that there is a time for everything that happens in our lives. And whenrepparttar 130233 appropriate time comes, things will start workingrepparttar 130234 way they were supposed to work. 3) You arerepparttar 130235 only person who can make yourself happy. Think of your happiness too and be kind to yourself. In life all of us have goals and ambitions. But inrepparttar 130236 pursuit of those goals we lose sight ofrepparttar 130237 bigger picture that we are doing all that to make ourselves happy. This is seen especially inrepparttar 130238 case of mothers who are doing so many things for their kids and family that they don’t remember as to when wasrepparttar 130239 last time they did something for their own happiness. It happens to all of us. Be more gentle on yourself. Make yourself happy and that can be done in so many ways. Treat yourself to some ice cream, buy a book that you were dying to read, spend a day lolling inrepparttar 130240 bed and doing nothing. We deserve it and so do our bodies. 4) Laughter isrepparttar 130241 best tranquilizer with no side effects. Laugh each and every day of your life. Humorous situations happen to us every single day. Whether you choose to enjoyrepparttar 130242 moment or not is your decision. There are so many excuses in our day-to-day life to have a good laugh. All we need to do is just look atrepparttar 130243 lighter side of life and enjoyrepparttar 130244 moment. When you laugh don’t think whether people are watching you or how much you laugh. It’s their problem that they cannot findrepparttar 130245 humor inrepparttar 130246 situation that you have found.

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