Written by Thor Trewoofe

Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005.

HAS AMERICA GONE TO THE DOGS? -- Or, "Woofstock" Here We Come! --

Canucks take a good deal of pride in their hockey, beer, and cellular telephones (especially those Fido commercials about perky pet-owners who bear a striking resemblance to their posh- or pathetic-looking pooches).

This weekend in Toronto, (the capital of everything BIG in Canada), they’re holding a weird and wonderful event, aptly called “Woofstock”, to celebrate man’s best friend (the dog) and to push every imaginable product and service to pamper one’s hip-looking hound.

The most fur-friendly towns in Canada are probably Dog Creek (British Columbia), Dog’s Nest (Ontario) and Dog Pound (Alberta). But,repparttar only place where they've actually waged a war overrepparttar 141489 issue of Fido-freedom is in Victoria, British Columbia. Elected officials recently passed a bylaw permitting off-leash dog walking and piddling (withrepparttar 141490 added bonus of doggie-doo-doo bags supplied free-of-charge in convenient receptacles) alongrepparttar 141491 scenic seashore and tourist-trap trail known as “Dallas Road”.

If you don't think that America has truly gone torepparttar 141492 dogs, then just take a peek at those nudge-nudge, wink-wink "bosom buddies" residing south ofrepparttar 141493 49th parallel.

No less than 1,086 geographic features (including airports, bars, bays, beaches, bridges, buildings, canals, capes, cemeteries, channels, churches, cliffs, crossings, dams, flats, gaps, glaciers, islands, keys, lakes, mines, oilfields, parks, pillars, post-offices, ranges, reservoirs, ridges, schools, springs, streams, summits, swamps, valleys, and wells) are dedicated to these blessed bow-wowing creatures.

It may be a "dog-eat-dog world" out there but judging fromrepparttar 141494 plethora of pet-inspired U.S. place names,repparttar 141495 most fido-friendly towns to hang out in are probably:

- Big Lick (North Carolina) - Canine Gulch (Alaska) - Dog Bluff (South Carolina) - Dog Canyon Estates (New Mexico) - Dog Corners (Maine), Dogs Corners (New Jersey) - Dog Creek (Oklahoma, Kentucky) - Dog Ear Lake (Florida) - Dog Hill (Tennessee) - Dog Pond (Arizona) - Dog Hole Lake (Florida) - Doggie Island (South Carolina) - Doghouse Junction (California) - Dog Island (Florida) - Dog Island Corner (Maine) - Dogpatch (Alaska, Arkansas, Arizona), Dog Patch (West Virginia) - Dog Ridge (Texas) - Dogtail Corners (New York) - Dogtown (Alabama, California, Florida, Kentucky, Maryland, Maine, Mississippi, New England, New York, Pennsylvania, Tennessee) - Dogsboro (Georgia) - Dog Walk (Illinois, Kentucky) - Dogway (West Virginia) - Gnaw Bone (Indiana) - Licking (Mississippi) - Mutt (Virginia) - Paw Paw (Illinois) - Poocham (New Hampshire) - Tick Bite (North Carolina) - Township of Dog Ear (South Dakota)

Canine critters are definitely BIG BUSINESS in America, home to millions of mischievous mutts, misbehaving mongrels not to mention their sometimes very ornery owners.

Emotional and Practical Efficiency.

Written by Thick Mick.

"Life is about living with people, not countingrepparttar seconds". With a grin on your face and an open mind, considerrepparttar 141334 following efficiencies:

Use one word where it is enough. Use two words where you wish to use twice as many. Find a friend who is that. Lose a friend who is not that. Redefine descriptions, perhaps.

Sparerepparttar 141335 rod and have a spare rod, as well as more energy. (T.M.)

Remember to rinse your disposable razor thoroughly to extend its workable life. You'll get six months from it!.

Oilrepparttar 141336 axle of your wheel barrow and de-greaserepparttar 141337 shafts. Inflatingrepparttar 141338 tyre is exercise-dependent!

Only curse if politically strategic.

Look your enemy inrepparttar 141339 eye, front or back of it. Look your friend inrepparttar 141340 eye;repparttar 141341 front of it.

Like timely flatulence, release torepparttar 141342 atmosphere all guilt that is not truly yours. Even if it is, consider a similar release!

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