Northwestern — a beautiful, old granite building — was a boarding school. A hundred boys lived there, ranging in age from seventh grade through twelfth, although building could have accommodated maybe twice as many. The school had been in existence for about a century. The hallway leading to gymnasium was lined with photographs of all graduating classes

The entrance to school featured two wrought iron gates and a long driveway that wound through extensive grounds. Trees, flowers and shrubs added to park-like atmosphere.

Northwestern was both a military and a naval academy, and some of its graduates had served in World War I and World War II. A couple of those who had been killed in action were buried on grounds. Considering age of building and its history, I suppose I should have expected ghosts — or rather, I should have expected ghost stories.

But I didn’t.

Not until one fall morning when my students came to class so upset that they couldn’t concentrate on their school work.

“Do you believe in ghosts?” one of them asked finally.

“Yeah, Ms. Ralph. Do you believe in ghosts?” several others chimed in.

While I was attending university to earn my teacher certification, none of professors had mentioned how you were supposed to handle a question like this.

“Well,” I said, “I think there are probably many things in this world that we don’t understand.”

By now, all of my students were giving me their utmost attention. If only they were this interested in English.

“Have you ever seen a ghost?” one of them asked.

I shook my head. “No. I’ve never seen a ghost.”

“We have,” said one young man.

“Really?” I said. “And when was this?”

“Last night.”

“In our room.”

“We did, too,” said a couple of others.

“What happened?” I asked.

“It was just after lights out. Our curtain started moving.”

With so many people communicating via Net and deciding to date virtual strangers, it is important to be safe and be smart. Common sense can go a long way to keep you safe. Here are some guidelines for playing it safe:

Watch out for someone who seems too good to be true. Begin by first communicating solely by email or online chat. Be vigilant in noticing odd behavior or inconsistencies. If someone is evasive, this is a red flag. "Listen" to your correspondent's words. The person at other end may not be who or what he/she says. Trust your instincts. If anything makes you uncomfortable, walk away for your own safety and protection.

Find out as much information as you can. Learn to ask many questions. Find out where he grew up, where she works, and how he is connected to his community. These are clues to finding out who this person really is. Be suspicious, if someone is unwilling to reveal any personal identifying information. Probe any discrepancies in their stories. If your correspondent is unwilling to answer your questions, this is another red flag. Continue with a great deal of caution.

Honesty is key to success. Talk on telephone and continue to learn more about your correspondent. A phone call can reveal a lot about a person's communication and social skills. It is worth cost of call to protect your security. But do not give out your phone number to a stranger. Trust takes time to develop. Only when you feel completely comfortable should you furnish your phone number.

Don't rush into anything. Meeting someone online and then arranging a date in a relatively short time can be dangerous. Take time to find out who this person really is. If someone is pressuring you to get together before you are ready, this is another warning sign. If anything feels strange as you get to know this person, then it is time to back away and look for another match.

If you decide to meet for a date, proceed with caution. Arrange meeting on your terms. The following is a guide to ensure that you have a safe encounter:

Before You Meet