© LeAnn R. Ralph 2004

Early in May here in west central Wisconsin, I can count on seeing a Ruby Throated Hummingbird hovering in front of my kitchen window, flitting back and forth, as if to say, "there was a hummingbird feeder RIGHT HERE last year. Where is it?"

And then I know it is time to put out hummingbird nectar. I feed a 3-to-1 mixture of water and sugar (3 cups of water and 1 cup of sugar brought to a boil and cooled to room temperature). After hummingbirds' long trip from South America, they are thin and hungry.

The general rule-of-thumb is a 4-to-1 mixture, but to start out in early spring I always use a 3-to-1 mixture. Later on in summer, when there are more flowers available, I switch to a 4-to-1 mixture.

I know it is important to wash hummingbird feeder when I fill it to clean out any mold. I know it is also important to thoroughly rinse hummingbird feeder when I am finished cleaning it to remove any soap or other chemicals.

If feeder has visible mold, I use a bleach solution (1 teaspoon of bleach to several cups of water) to kill off mold and mildew. Then I rinse feeder thoroughly, under running water, for several minutes with hot water and for several minutes with cold water.

The best hummingbird feeder I've found is a Rubbermaid feeder. It holds two cups of nectar, and it is as sturdy now as it was when I bought it four years ago. Other hummingbird feeders cracked when I tried to wash them, either at end of first year or beginning of next.

I also set out two of those little "flower balls" for hummingbirds — little round balls that hold about a quarter cup of nectar with a large, brightly-colored plastic flower that fits down inside neck. The flower balls fit into a holder that mounts on a steel rod pushed down into ground. The hummingbirds love "flowers" that give them another source of food.

Usually, right around our yard, we have between four and six pair of Ruby Throated Hummingbirds. Later on in summer, when their offspring start coming for nectar, we have many more hummingbirds flying around yard. Pine trees on east and north sides of yard provide a perch for hummingbirds while they wait their turn to get at feeder.

Title: Parenting Starts Before Pregnancy Author: Margaret Paul, Ph.D. E-mail: mailto:margaret@innerbonding.com Copyright: © 2004 by Margaret Paul URL: http://www.innerbonding.com Word Count: 817 Category: Parenting

Parenting Starts Before Pregnancy By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

While it may seem farfetched to some people, many of my clients remember what they felt and experienced while still in womb. Comments such as these are not unusual:

“I knew even before I was born that my mother didn’t want me.”

“I could feel my mother’s fear and anxiety even before I was born.”

Parenting does not start once child is born. Good parenting starts even before getting pregnant. It starts by caring about what you eat, how much exercise and sleep you get, and by making sure that you are taking responsibility for your feelings of anxiety and stress. Your baby will feel what you feel, so learning how to be in peace and joy before getting pregnant is part of good parenting.

I loved being pregnant. I had always wanted children so I was thrilled to be pregnant. I loved feeling baby moving within me, awed by very fact of creating new life. I loved feeling an elbow or a knee slide across my stomach. I loved that my body could be a receptacle for bringing through this soul, this angel from heaven. I could not think of anything more profound, more worth doing. Who was this unique little person growing in my body?

I read every book I could on parenting and thought endlessly how I wanted to be a different parent than my parents were.

The problem was that I have never thought about how much my relationship with myself and with my husband might affect this child.

My husband was angry, distant and withdrawn during my pregnancy and first three months after giving birth to our son. He was a person who wanted control and he was not happy that I got pregnant six months before we had planned. He didn’t open his heart until our son smiled at him at three months of age.