EI is based on a number of competencies that can be learned such as creativity, intentionality, resilience, and integrated self. Resilience was named number one stress-buster by Wall Street Journal.

It works fast because it doesn’t go into why. It just starts teaching you how.

Most clients pick it up quickly because it’s a relief and brings immediate rewards. After just three months, Lulwa Al Marzooqi wrote “Since I started learning emotional intelligence, I have noticed following positive changes:

A Picture's Worth a Thousand Words

Sometimes this reflective phenomenon is easily seen between parents and children. On his TV show, Dr. Phil explains how children's emotions and actions are reflections of their parents' unconscious emotions and actions. Dr. Phil uses TV cameras in people's homes to catch this reflection on video.

In one family, cameras reveal how accurately a son reflects emotional state of his mother. The mother is angry. The son is angry. Mom throws things when she is frustrated. So does her child. When feeling out of control, mom smacks her son. When having a tantrum, child hits his mom. Before mother saw her own actions on tape, she mistakenly thought that her son is cause of disharmony. The mother was unaware that her son is reflecting her own feelings. After seeing tape, mom realizes that she will have to first change her own behavior before her child's behavior will change.

The Pet Reflection

Animals, like children, also mirror our unconscious emotions and actions. Just like son who reflects anger of his mother, our pet "children" reflect how we really feel when we're not aware of our true feelings and behaviors. If pets are "misbehaving," our pet pals are most likely telling us that we're "misbehaving." We're out of alignment with our life goals and don't know it!

Animals see beyond our "I've got it all together" outer appearances. They know what's really going on inside us. Being quite sensitive, it's easy for animals to know that we're angry, scared, confused or depressed before we know it. And to inform us, our pet buddies show us what's going on with our feelings in only way they have available—through their actions. Behaving in unusual or annoying ways is usually only means critters have to get our attention.

Animals are in our lives to assist us to have more fun, joy and harmony. When pets are happy, they're reflecting to us that we're being successful in living in a way that's harmonious and nurturing. And when pets are "misbehaving," our pesky pals are "telling" us that we're not acting in our own best interest. In a very real way, our pets "r" us.

Here's an example of how "pet reflection" works:

Wishbone, a Cocker Spaniel Who "Leaks"

Wishbone is a sweet cocker spaniel who loves people. Unfortunately, this wiggling ball of fur pees uncontrollably when he interacts with people. If people are standing too close when Wishbone greets them, he leaks all over their feet. Thinking Wishbone's problem is physical, his "mom," Ann, takes spaniel to several veterinarians. Wishbone gets a clean bill of health. The cause of problem is not physiological.

What's this leaking spaniel reflecting about Ann? In one moment his behavior says, "I'm happy to see you." The next second he repels people by peeing on them. The spunky spaniel is giving mixed messages to people he enjoys being with. Wishbone might be reflecting that Ann is giving mixed messages to people she enjoys being with.