Written by Kay L. Schalgel

How many times in life have you been faced by circumstances beyond your control? To come face to face withrepparttar very things in your past, that you’ve spent most of your life running away from? Well, not actually running, per say, but definitely eager to put it behind you. How many times have you been admonished, "don't talk about it. It’srepparttar 135022 past. Let it go.” That's very good advice, if we can do it. Keepingrepparttar 135023 past inrepparttar 135024 past is a very tricky business. It hasrepparttar 135025 worst way of popping up when we least expect. When you unexpectedly run into an old friend; an off hand comments of “remember when", or worse, an old boyfriend or lover popping up atrepparttar 135026 worst time. Needless to say, you're not going to get rid ofrepparttar 135027 past

The past is a part of us. It isrepparttar 135028 foundation of what our present as been built on. Our personalities have been shaped by it. Are we permanently imprisoned by our past? NO. I can't even say that loud enough. Yes, we have built onrepparttar 135029 past but we can definitely remodel or even tear downrepparttar 135030 house and build again. For those of us who were victims of childhood abuse or neglect, it seems impossible. The past is a constant reminder of shame, guilt, of never knowing what will come next. We never knew what it was like to take ownership of our bodies, own emotions. and sometimes even our own thoughts. That was then. This is now. It's time we learned how we take back our bodies and minds. They belong to us and only us. No one should ever have that control again. I'll say it again you're not going to get rid ofrepparttar 135031 past, its going to keep popping up now and then, but you're going to have learn to handle it differently. Instead of it being an enemy, and persisting to keep obsessing onrepparttar 135032 bad memories. With knowledge and practice, slowly but surelyrepparttar 135033 good memories will begin to take their place. "What good memories you say?” Was there a neighbor that would talk, listen, feed, or just give you a safe place to hide at times? The kids you played with who may or may not have been abused themselves? There were some good times and memories even if infrequent they are there buried somewhere underrepparttar 135034 bad ones. I myself, rememberrepparttar 135035 trips to Kentucky that we frequently took to see my step dad’s parents. It wasrepparttar 135036 only time that he sobered up and stopped hurting or beating us. We didn't know why atrepparttar 135037 time, but who cared? It was safe and we loved it. We had vacations inrepparttar 135038 summer with just my mother andrepparttar 135039 neighbor. We loved this neighbor so much and knew she loved us. There were special pets who loved us unconditionally. Yes, there were long periods of violence and humiliation but there were also memories stuck in here and there that didn't hurt and were good memories. For most of us, those good memories were so overshadowed by bad, that we couldn’t appreciaterepparttar 135040 good ones. Some may have only happened once, and for a very short time perhaps, but they were good. That isrepparttar 135041 foundation you have to build on. Now that we are working onrepparttar 135042 good, what do you do withrepparttar 135043 bad? That is what takes some work.

We can’t demolish allrepparttar 135044 bad and throw it all in one big disaster dumpster. We have to sift though it just one more time. Not all of it, of course, but we need to findrepparttar 135045 lessons we learned,repparttar 135046 courage we had, andrepparttar 135047 strength we earned. Last, but definitely not least,repparttar 135048 wisdom and compassion, we acquired along this journey. Most, if not all of us, need help with this part ofrepparttar 135049 process of recovery. A professional health worker such as psychiatrist, therapist, counselor, or pastor can be a really big help. For those of us with less serious problems to be worked through a good friend, journaling and reading self help books can even dorepparttar 135050 trick. Theremany organization such as al-anon, AA, violence shelters. I could go on and on but you getrepparttar 135051 point. They offer support and help. Even with a competent professional we can all use some outside support. For me a journal was almost a must. It helped me know where I’d been, and how far I’d come. It has become record of my journey—one that I will always cherish.

All In The Mind

Written by Alvin Poh

“In life, if you give yourself a concession, you’d take it” -Alvin Poh

As part of my exercise regime when I was younger, I made it a point to have a run around my neighbourhood as often as I could. Although when I say “as often as I could”, it usually meant only once every week, or none at all. But I was still proud ofrepparttar fact that I ran. The route was pretty tough for me, with slopes and small hills, and finishing every run gave me a sense of accomplishment and made me feel healthier and fitter.

Anyone who runs knows that you will always haverepparttar 134998 urge to give up, or to cut short your route. Whenrepparttar 134999 going gets tough, you go home and relax. It’s human nature. And this is what is going to berepparttar 135000 main topic of this book - Overcoming human nature.

The fact really is that many of us haverepparttar 135001 potential to perform, and to excel. What do you think ofrepparttar 135002 quote you see atrepparttar 135003 top ofrepparttar 135004 page? Do you agree with it? This quote was actually invented during one of my runs. I remembered thatrepparttar 135005 day was exceptionally hot, but I had missed a few days of exercise, andrepparttar 135006 sedentary lifestyle was getting to me. So I went to put on my running shoes, and started on my usual route. I was like a caged-up dog finally let loose, and practically pranced downrepparttar 135007 stairs torepparttar 135008 street. My mind was full of high-energy, positive thoughts:

“This is great! I’m finally going out – Time to work those legs!”

“I’m raring to go! Lemme have ‘em!”

When I hitrepparttar 135009 pavement, I let go of my pent-up energy, and really ran. I was fresh as a daisy, and ran withrepparttar 135010 wind in my hair. It felt really good. I was f-r-e-e!

Ten minutes later, I couldn’t have felt worse. The heat was getting unbearable, andrepparttar 135011 humidity was horrible. I was sweating profusely, and my legs felt like lead. The initial freshness had all gone away, and I was feeling like hell.

This was when little specks of negativity started to appear in my head.

“I shouldn’t be out here in this weather. I should be resting at home.”

“I’m risking heat exhaustion here.”

“I run a lot anyway – what’s one run less?”

”That hill in front’s so long…I should probably just turn back.”

With every one that came into my head, my perseverance dwindled. Every negative thought that came into my mind seemed to take root, grow, and multiply. And with every negative thought, my steps grew smaller, and slower. My lungs felt constricted, and I had an overwhelming urge to stop.

Interestingly, I think I felt almost like how those cartoon characters would, with a small devil and angel quarrelling above my head.

This was whenrepparttar 135012 realisation suddenly struck me though. The thought hit me square onrepparttar 135013 face, and I could have sworn that there was even a loud “wham!” when it connected.

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