Double Your LivingWritten by David Wood
I want you to know beauty of life. I want you to AWAKEN, and see that people want to connect with you. I want you to finally realize how desperately you want to connect with other human beings, and then to distinguish, to see clearly, 100 barriers we accidentally, and deliberately put up to stop that happening! At core most of us are raised believing we are bad. Unfortunately, if this is true, we are also surrounded by people feeling SAME. The fact that intimacy DOES occur on planet COULD be referred to by some as a miracle. If one scared human being looks like actually getting close to us, fear of BEING SEEN, and consequently being REJECTED leads to instant barriers. I believe purpose of life is to find those barriers and bring them down. But that won't happen today..... I want you to get to know, how scared you are, and love yourself for it. Then I want you to realize how scared everyone else is, and laugh at joke. (You walk into a party and head to kitchen - safe from scary people! - but they're feeling same way! It's a joke!) But you won't get to know this - to really know this - today. I want you to remember with joy most intimate, loving experiences of your life, and then imagine them tripled. Imagine them tripled in intensity, and imagine having them five - times - more - often! (That's FIFTEEN times intimacy and love for mathematicians out there). Imagine lying on your death bed, surrounded by loved ones, breathing 'I have truly lived, like few have lived before me'. Imagine them saying at your funeral: 'This woman, or this man, will be remembered for truly opening up to others. For truly seeing people and loving them as they are. And! For first finding out what it took to love her self, so that she could love others.' Is that all I want? No. I want you to be so uninhibited by thinking of others, that self expression becomes NORM for you! We've been conditioned since age of TWO......to quash our impulses. Our natural desires are now strained through filters so fine, so powerful, and so automatic, that perhaps -out of TEN, only 1-3 of our natural impulses make it through to outside world. Is that possible? Could we be 30% expressed? Who has ever felt impulse to hug someone, or kiss someone, or compliment someone, and held back? I had strong impulse to hug my gardener! But it felt "INAPPROPRIATE". But who knows how she would have felt? Who knows how that could have impacted her whole day, and who she might have hugged? It was a natural desire which never got expressed. Inappropriate. How many INAPPROPRIATES do you have in your life?
| | Truth TellingWritten by David Wood
"Every with-hold you have from someone, is a brick in wall between you." Do you tell truth? What percentage of time? 100%? Or 90%? And when you do tell truth, do you tell 100% of it? Or 90%? "You look great". "I don't mind". "Yes, sex is good". "Everything's fine at home". "I'm sorry". "I didn't mean to". "Something came up". And what about truths we don't say - "with- holds"? "I'm really upset that you canceled on me". "I don't feel respected by you". "I lie to you so you'll like me". "I'm worried if I tell you truth you'll be angry". "It's important to me that you be on time". You're either telling truth, lying, or with-holding. Even most of us with best intentions DO NOT tell 100% of truth, 100% of time. Why? We CAN'T tell whole truth - about what we want, how we feel, what we love, what we hate. Because we need people to like us, to love us, to accept us, to want to hang around us. "If I told Jill she needs a wash, she'd be upset, or even freak out". "If I told Bill I'm not enjoying sex, we'd both be embarrassed, and he might leave me". So we get to protect, hide-out, manipulate, and control. The Irony If we don't tell truth, people CAN'T love us! The only way we can really be loved - really be accepted, is to show who we are. To be who we are. Only THEN, once you are truly seen, is it possible for someone to accept real you. If we instead show a "front" ("No, no - it's OK that you're late"), they can only like, love, accept "front"! Then we feel more alone than ever, and maybe even resentful. And consider this: if you don't show who you ~really~ are, how will beautiful souls on planet who are looking for ~you~, find you? They'll see your "front", and move on! In "The Truth About Relationships", Greg Baer says: "Only when I tell truth can I be clearly seen by others. Only then can I feel ~accepted~ by them and feel that they genuinely care about my happiness (Real Love). I create opportunity to be loved when I tell truth about myself." So there it is. How do we be who we really are? How do we give people chance to see us, to accept "real me"? Risky, but simple: Tell Truth. When we Tell Truth I recently had opportunity to dig deep, and reveal a very uncomfortable truth. I was developing a nice friendship with a very beautiful woman, and at a certain point, had a "flash": one reason I was drawn to beautiful women in particular, was that love/affection/acceptance from ~this~ group of human beings, felt valid and important - I let it in. However, affection from people I didn't find physically attractive, I tended to devalue. Let's get right down to it - "I could be using her to feel important!!???". While I wasn't proud of this view, and am committed to moving past it, at that moment it was part of who I am, and I risked sharing it with her.
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