Women are conditioned to be people pleasers. Women are taught to be “nice” even if that’s means comprising their happiness, and often times that is exactly what happens. We have a tendency to do, and say things just so
other person’s feelings don’t get hurt. How many times have you wanted to say something, but thought, you can’t say that, they might think you’re too harsh, or unpleasant. Times have changed, and now women are accepting their authenticity with grace and happiness. How did they do it? They changed their internal thoughts to reprogram their conditioning. Are you still playing “old tapes” that are in your head?Take this quiz to find out if your thoughts are sabotaging your happiness.
1. You are at a dinner party, and you accidentally spill red wine on your dress and on carpet, do you: a. Feel like a fool and hide out in bathroom. b. Immediately get club soda to soak up stain. c. Apologize profusely saying you are such a klutz.
2. You just lost a job promotion, do you: a. Feel frustrated! You are never going to get what you want, it seems like whole world is against you. b. You feel nothing; you never expected to get it in first place. c. Feel a little disappointed, but know something better will come your way soon.
3. When you buy an expensive item do you: a. Feel awkward and selfish. b. Feel like you deserve it. c. Guilty, because you bought it to fill a void.
4. When someone gives you a gift you hate, do you: a. Take it back, it’s no big deal. b. Keep it, just in case they came over and ask to see it. c. Call up a friend, and complain that you can’t believe they gave you such a horrible gift.
5. When you make a mistake, does voice inside your head say: a. I could have made a better choice, oh well, I will do better next time. b. I can’t believe I am so stupid, I am so mad at myself for doing that. c. Again, I keep making same mistake over and over.
6. When a friend has overstepped your boundaries, do you: a. Get irate and really rip into them demanding that they never do that again. b. Simply call them on it, and explain that is not acceptable to you. c. Say nothing because you really don’t want to start an argument.
7. When someone gives you a compliment, do you: a. Graciously say thank you, and feel good about yourself. b. Awkwardly say thanks, and change subject. c. Say no, and talk about how that statement isn’t true.
Results: 1. a. Your thoughts are telling you that your sense of self is easily threatened, and you need to start working on your self-esteem. You run away from problems instead of dealing with them. b. You are a great problem solver, and your thoughts will assist you in getting what you want. c. Apologizing is a nice way to say that it was an accident, however profusely apologizing is an indication that you take on more responsible than necessary. Your thoughts are giving you more guilt than needed.
2. a. You must change your thought process now! When your thoughts are negative, and you feel like you don’t have a good support system your thoughts will create that. Keep your thoughts positive! b. Your thoughts are keeping you safe. However staying in a safe mode, and not taking risks will leave you in a rut. Start thinking about a little risk taking. c. Your thoughts are right on target. It’s normal to feel a little disappointed, and it is healthy to get ready for next opportunity.
