Copyright: 2005 Article Autoresponder: mailto:Confidence_Is_Cool@epublishersresource.com Author Contact Email: mailto:diana@forwardpromotion.com Word Count: 749 words

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CONFIDENCE IS COOL By Oscar Bruce

REMEMBER THE TIME you could not think of anything to say to person sitting across from you in that little café or across conference table? You stammered when they looked your way. They smiled at you, but still, there was no way you could reach out ...and you lost yet another chance to make a good contact.

REMEMBER THAT PARTY, when you were standing off to one side by yourself, and other people were stealing brief glances at you? Still, you couldn't think of right things to say.

REMEMBER LEAVING THAT MEETING? Just ahead of you was person you really wanted to meet and get to know. You could not quite summon up courage to approach. They walked away into night and out of your life.

BY FAR THE MOST TERRIFYING BARRIER to developing relationships with strangers is learning to talk to them at first meeting. Making first contact is sometimes fearful. Even thinking of approaching a new person makes you break out in a cold sweat.

YOU CAN'T GET THERE FROM HERE? How did things get like this, you wonder? It is because family and peer groups ripped from you at an early age innocent social adeptness of young. The bullying and being "cut down to size" that passes for socialization scarred your psyche. The fearful result is that you are not just shy, but gun shy. But, all that can change. It can be accomplished.

Copyright: 2005 Article Autoresponder: mailto:Is_Silence_Really_Golden@epublishersresource.com Author Contact Email: mailto:diana@forwardpromotion.com Word Count: 599 words

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The requirements for publishing this article are:

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Is Silence Really Golden? By Oscar Bruce

"DEAR Dr. OSCAR. Why does this happen to me? Someone introduces themselves to me. I tell them my name. Then suddenly I realize I can not recall their name."

MY RESPONSE... "Simple, you didn't forget their name - you never really heard it in first place. Your focus was on yourself and not other person."

A Zen phrase says, "To see, you must get out of middle of picture." Remember - you're in middle of your own picture. So, how best to move focus from yourself to others?

The great psychologist, Carl Rogers, said, "Listening is most powerful force we know for releasing potential in others. Real communication occurs when we listen with understanding - to see idea and attitude from other person's point of view, to sense how it feels to them, to achieve their frame of reference in regard to thing they are talking about." This is key to becoming a master motivator and persuader.

Dale Carnegie, father of positive thinking, said, "You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years trying to get other people interested in you".