Compassion, Part 2

Written by Rinatta Paries

Having compassion toward others is a gift of connectedness you give yourself and a gift of presence you give others. While difficult to define, compassion is a way of being, and you will seerepparttar definition emerge amongrepparttar 101956 three concepts presented here.

1. Compassion involves seeing others as "self."

No matter how different others are, or how different their circumstances are from yours, we all want essentiallyrepparttar 101957 same things from life. We want happiness, satisfaction and love. We want connectedness, safety and understanding.

When you are struggling to feel compassion for others, struggling to put yourself in their shoes, struggling to understand what they are going through, remember this similarity. Remember that everyone ultimately wants what you want.

2. Compassion does not involve self-sacrifice or martyrdom at your expense.

When in a disagreement with someone -- whether your partner, a friend or your boss -- remember to seerepparttar 101958 other as "self." Atrepparttar 101959 same time, be careful not to mistake compassion for being a pushover. Don't justify another's behavior atrepparttar 101960 cost of your feelings or discount your feelings.

Being compassionate inrepparttar 101961 context of disagreement means being understanding, supportive and kind, while respecting and setting your boundaries. You must be present to both simultaneously in order to both take care of yourself and others.

Time for Change ... When your basic systems no longer work for you

Written by Edward B. Toupin

I've heard many clients and friends discuss how they just can't seem to move beyond their current situations in life. They can't find a better job, make more money, find happiness in relationships, or find fulfillment. The question I usually ask is, "What is your idea ofrepparttar perfect, fulfilling situation?" They usually sputter a few ideas then stop and realize that they truly don't know what it is that would bring them fulfillment.

As we grow and change, we eventually run intorepparttar 101955 outer limits of our safety zone known as our "belief system." The belief system confines our existence, and consists ofrepparttar 101956 knowledge and experiences that shape who we are and what we value in our lives. What was fulfilling, is now a burden. What was exciting, is now boring. At this point, we must learn how to extend, or change, our belief systems to allow us to move forward and find new meaning and new fulfillment.

--- Spheres of Belief ---

A belief system can be viewed as consisting of three distinct, yet interconnected, "spheres of belief." Each sphere represents an area of our lives that we maintain as our own secure zones. Our core values and beliefs that affect our daily lives are taken fromrepparttar 101957 combination of these three spheres.

* Sphere One: The first sphere contains relationships and our interpersonal goals. It represents our interaction with others in our lives including family and friends. It provides us with a foundation of security for interpersonal interaction and growth.

* Sphere Two: The second sphere contains professional goals. This isrepparttar 101958 area of our life that supportsrepparttar 101959 ability to work toward a vision withrepparttar 101960 knowledge to provide security for ourselves and our family.

* Sphere Three: The third and final sphere contains personal goals. This sphere contains our knowledge and experiences that define our personal desires, goals, and direction. This is alsorepparttar 101961 area in which we store our personal identities.

The primary benefit of building and maintaining your spheres is that they provide a solid and definable arena in which you can live and work comfortably. However,repparttar 101962 problem is that, occasionally, these spheres become too confining and eventually limit your growth. In essence, when you hitrepparttar 101963 outer wall of any sphere, you must determinerepparttar 101964 best way to increaserepparttar 101965 size ofrepparttar 101966 sphere to accommodate your growth and still maintain your security.

--- Establishing Core Values ---

>From birth, we constantly receive information from which we build and create a belief system and core values. The information comes from our environment, parents, people we feel are in authority, and various other inputs. In some cases,repparttar 101967 environment is positive and in others, it is negative. Regardless, it is that with which we all learn to cope until it is familiar and comfortable.

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