Communication Expert reveals 5 keys to self expression without limits

Written by Peter Murphy

Peter Murphy recently interviewed communication expert John Barker. John is a professional coach and author with a Bachelor of Arts degree in Communication Arts and Sciences. He even served inrepparttar White House where he worked withrepparttar 101847 White House Communications Agency.

They discussed communication and uncovered some valuable insights that people can immediately apply to make measurable improvements in their lives.


1 Nowadays more and more people are learning how to let go of limiting feelings to improverepparttar 101848 quality of their lives. When it comes to communicating effectively with other people what arerepparttar 101849 main barriers to effective and purposeful communication, and how can we let go of these limitations?


The barriers vary from person to person, however,repparttar 101850 most common one I encounter in working with people isrepparttar 101851 desire to change others to fit our expectations. There are many paths torepparttar 101852 same destination; if we release our desires we open up an infinite number of possibilities. So long as we agree onrepparttar 101853 destination we want -repparttar 101854 feeling we want - "the how" doesn't matter.

Any time we feel we want to change someone or something, this is a time when we can recognize and release our desire for control.

The other part of this, is that very often we are re-living past conversations. If we have had a conflict with someone inrepparttar 101855 past; if we hold onto that feeling we bring it torepparttar 101856 new conversation. We brace our self for dealing withrepparttar 101857 inevitable confrontation and we don't really hear what is being said inrepparttar 101858 moment. This is why it is so important and valuable to be able to release things as they come up.


2 Very often in life we know what to say and yet get tongue tied and fail to follow through whenrepparttar 101859 pressure is on. What isrepparttar 101860 answer to this common challenge?


We become tongue-tied or freeze up due to our attachment torepparttar 101861 outcome. There IS no pressure, only attachment to feelings and outcomes. By releasing on our attachment torepparttar 101862 outcome and welcomingrepparttar 101863 experience as it occurs, we free ourselves to experiencerepparttar 101864 moment effortlessly. This experience allows us to perform at our best.

And, if a person does feel anxiety, stress or self-consciousness in a situation like this, trying to makerepparttar 101865 feeling go away only makes it stronger. I often userepparttar 101866 analogy of a big brother picking on a younger sibling. Why does he do this? To get a reaction. The bigger and betterrepparttar 101867 reaction,repparttar 101868 more we encourage it. But if we welcome what is going on, he gives up. It is not as much fun as gettingrepparttar 101869 reaction! And, he goes away.

The same is true ofrepparttar 101870 feelings we want to go away. If we welcome them and allow them to be, it is amazing how quickly that feeling will dissolve and be replaced with a feeling of peace and calm. And, sometimes we can even smile or laugh at ourselves about it because it is such a relief to just allow ourselves to be how we are.


3 Dealing with difficult people can really stretch our patience and verbal flexibility. What are your top tips for handling these situations?


Release! Release! Release!

It is important to remain aware of, and release, our desire for security, approval and control as these feelings arise in our consciousness. It can also be important to recognizerepparttar 101871 other person's need for security, approval and control as well. Understanding allows compassion.

I know I've wasted a lot of energy in my life trying to change other people! It's an impossible job, really. And, it is amazing how often, when we stop resisting how people are, they just magically seem to make those changes we wanted inrepparttar 101872 first place.

Think On Paper

Written by Ed Hirsch

What isrepparttar most valuable use of your time, right now? Whatever it is, work on THAT. Your ability to discipline yourself to work on those few tasks that can makerepparttar 101846 greatest difference in your life isrepparttar 101847 key quality that makes everything else possible for you.

Imagine that you are going to receive a $100,000 bonus atrepparttar 101848 end ofrepparttar 101849 month if you can work on your highest priority items every minute of every day. How would you change your behavior and what would you do differently?

You must continually ask yourself, "What activities in my life can I cut back on, delegate, or discontinue to free up more time for my most important activities?"

Your most valuable asset in life is your earning ability. Your ability to work, to produce, to earn money in our competitive economy by applying your brain and ability to your world enables you to generate tens of thousands of dollars each year.

If you want to increase your standard of living, you must increase your earning ability through a systematic and deliberate process of learning and practicing new skills and abilities.

What will you absolutely, positively have to be excellent at doing three to five years from now for you to continue enjoying your current or an even higher standard of living?

Regular planning assures that you spend more time on activities of higher value. This increases your effectiveness and your efficiency in everything you do. Perhapsrepparttar 101850 most important rule of all is for you to "Think on paper!"

Impose a sense of order on your life by making a detailed list of every single thing you have to do forrepparttar 101851 foreseeable future.

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