"Choices - The Search For Control"

Written by Glen Gould

If you were to take allrepparttar choices you have made to this point in life and magically add them all together, you would have - you. Each of us isrepparttar 136491 equivalent ofrepparttar 136492 choices we’ve made to this point in our lives. Choices. We all make them. But why?

Have you ever taken an action and wondered why? Each day we are faced with literally thousands of choices. Some occupy our thoughts on a conscious level, some do not. I thought aboutrepparttar 136493 color ofrepparttar 136494 tie I would wear today, but I gave little thought torepparttar 136495 turn I made out of my driveway, I just took it. Each of these were choices. Have you ever wondered why you makerepparttar 136496 choices you make?

After years of teaching golf, I discovered that many things that people do are done passively, without thought or planning. Tiger Woods does not think about how he gripsrepparttar 136497 club in a tournament, he does it by “feel”. Yet when he practices, he may take great care in adjusting his grip torepparttar 136498 optimum position each and every time he gripsrepparttar 136499 club. When driving a car in excess of two-hundred miles per hour, Dale Earnhardt Jr. doesn’t think about how he will moverepparttar 136500 wheel, he does it naturally.

These are examples of learned responses, things that are done almost by second nature byrepparttar 136501 performer and they are very similar torepparttar 136502 learned responses we all have in our lives. Each of us has things we do almost subconsciously, you may visit a drive through coffee virtually without thinking about it. Marketers know this and they prey on our habits, our learned responses. McDonalds and other fast food restaurants have spent billions of dollars to train us to effortlessly and thoughtlessly spend our money on a number four with a large diet coke.

Have you ever observedrepparttar 136503 people at work and how they will instinctively reply torepparttar 136504 question “how are you today?“ Some will reply, great!, some, fair to middlin‘, and some I’m tired. How can someone be tired first thing inrepparttar 136505 morning? Ok, perhaps a rough night every once in a while, but these folks are tired every day. To quote Earl Nightingale, “they are just reciting their lines.” Learned responses are a part of our every day life. “How are you today?” The response isrepparttar 136506 same each and every day; “fine!” Rarely to we examinerepparttar 136507 conditioned, learned responses we give and where they come from. More important isrepparttar 136508 effect they have on our lives -repparttar 136509 learned responses we have dramatically effect our lives by providing us with our perceived reality.

What if we could alterrepparttar 136510 perception of our reality? What if we had, literally and perceptively, no limits? What could we accomplish? What could we do? How happy could we possibly be?

In order to destroy our self imposed limits, we must examine their origin andrepparttar 136511 validity of them. Each of our learned responses, our locked assumptions can be traced to one of Your Ten Relationships in Life.

The first relationship is with your family. This isrepparttar 136512 first thing you encounter in life. You were issued a mother and father, perhaps siblings and a host of in-laws and relatives. These people are in your life whether you like it or not and your reaction to them and with them directly effects your ability to have further relationships.

Yesterday I Wept

Written by Val k

Apologies to Iyanla Vanzat. But yesterday I wept. And it was not for joy that I wept. Like Andrea Agassi, who inrepparttar Atlanta Olympics, won gold for his country, America. And neither did I weep from nostalgia like some former East Germans remembering a bygone era. No, not like these. I wept not because I mourned a friend. Like Christ weeping for Lazarus. But forrepparttar 136466 same reason many people throw themselves off bridges, take an overdose of sleeping pills, and smash their cars against other cars. I wept because of love. Sounds familiar?

Yes, many of us cry over break ups and unrequited love. Or even, fromrepparttar 136467 ill treatments of a spouse. And why do we? Because we as humans are prone to emotions.

Love is an emotion. And a most powerful one at that. Without it our lives will be incomplete. No matterrepparttar 136468 form it takes—whether it is amorous or platonic or agape—it’srepparttar 136469 same. But before you call me a “hopeless romantic” I will ask this: Would you rather exist like a machine? Or as a fictional android—human-looking robots—knowing no love?

But love, however, should not be confused with sex. These are two different things. Sex is a physical act. (We do it for pleasure.) Love onrepparttar 136470 other hand is an emotional bond. (It defies common sense.)

I have read and heard many things said about love and sex. Butrepparttar 136471 most memorable, for me, is this one from Jason Solomon: “Sex is easy and cheap; love requires work.” And I found it, of all places, in a movie review. (Speak of serendipity.)

Yes, love unlike sex requires work (but some may disagree). Unlike sex, love cannot be bought atrepparttar 136472 spur ofrepparttar 136473 moment. Like a Mars bar. Or a one-night stand. It takes time to appreciate. Like real estate. Or a Rolls Royce. Love also requires patience—a lot of it—and forgiveness. Forgiveness?

Yes, forgiveness. You must be willing to forgive those who hurt you. This might not be easy but it is an act which must be done. Because its other alternative is animosity. And this—like acid—corrodes. And this is not good for your mental health. So, forgive.

Now for my story. I loved a girl. And I told her this whenever I hadrepparttar 136474 chance. I whispered it into her ears. I wrote her verses. I even sent them to her as text. I thought things were moving well. But I was love struck wrong. For my much sort after damsel,repparttar 136475 “girl of my dreams” whom I had wooed for many months, was snapped up by a guy she had barely known for a week. And to make it worse, he was a friend.

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