Change the Words and Change the World

Written by Kevin B. Burk, Author of The Relationship Handbook


If we want to change our lives in any way, all we need to do is to change our words, thoughts and beliefs. When we changerepparttar words, we changerepparttar 122240 world.

Overrepparttar 122241 course of this handbook, you may discover a number of beliefs that no longer support you. By following this simple, three-step process, you can change your beliefs. By consciously creating beliefs that support us, we can change our reality and enhance our lives.

AWARENESS The first and most important step towards changing our beliefs and improving our lives is to become consciously aware of our beliefs. We must identify each thought that shapes our experiences. We have to name our thoughts. We must become conscious ofrepparttar 122242 exact words that we have been using to create our realities. This isrepparttar 122243 first step towards mastering our minds.

So much of our life is governed by our unconscious thoughts, beliefs and patterns. We have lived with so many of these thoughts for so long that we believe that they're actually real. We tell ourselves "that's justrepparttar 122244 way things are." Many of these thoughts are beliefs about who we are and what we're entitled to--and almost all of these beliefs denyrepparttar 122245 truth of who we are, limit our potential and cut us off fromrepparttar 122246 source of our happiness and prosperity.

We must become aware of our thoughts and beliefs. This handbook is designed to support our awareness.

OWNERSHIP Once we've become aware of a belief,repparttar 122247 second step is to own it. We must accept it. We must take personal responsibility for it. We must recognize thatrepparttar 122248 belief belongs to us, and that it is a part of who we are. Most importantly, we must accept that we createdrepparttar 122249 belief.

This process is simple, but not always easy. We have to accept and acknowledge that we are responsible for creating beliefs that are often negative, painful, and limiting. On a conscious level we tell ourselves that we would never do this. Why on earth would we choose to believe that we are unworthy, damaged, unlovable, unskilled, unlucky, or any ofrepparttar 122250 millions of other possibilities? Strange as it seems, even our most negative, painful beliefs were created to serve and support us. Every single one of our beliefs exists becauserepparttar 122251 ego is trying to protect us from pain. As painful asrepparttar 122252 belief itself may be, repparttar 122253 ego believes thatrepparttar 122254 pain thatrepparttar 122255 belief shields us from is infinitely greater. Just because these beliefs no longer serve us, doesn't mean that they are bad or wrong.

It's often easier to own a belief when we are able to identify repparttar 122256 origins of that belief. If we understand that we created a belief to help us cope with a particular experience, we can accept how that belief served us atrepparttar 122257 time. This process can also help us to uncover beliefs we created because of things we were told as children.

While it's often helpful to explore where and when we first created a belief, we have to be careful. Our egos will encourage us to deflectrepparttar 122258 responsibility forrepparttar 122259 beliefs to protect us. It's one thing to recognize that we believe that we're not worthy of being loved (for example) because our parents didn't spend enough time with us. It's quite another to blame our parents for creating this belief and ruining our lives. Our parents didn't createrepparttar 122260 belief--we did. We interpreted an experience, created assumptions around it, developed expectations and createdrepparttar 122261 belief. And until we accept this, we can't change that belief.

Our egos can also interfere withrepparttar 122262 ownership process by encouraging us to identify withrepparttar 122263 limiting belief. The ego can trick us into reinforcing our negative beliefs, by turning those beliefs back on us. Essentially, we tell ourselves that we're unworthy because we created a belief that we're unworthy. We beat ourselves up for beating ourselves up. Without awareness, repparttar 122264 ego has us coming and going.

The Nature of Anger

Written by Kevin B. Burk, Author of The Relationship Handbook


Many of us have some very definite ideas about anger. We see anger as destructive and hurtful. We consider it to be an inappropriate response. We equate anger with violence. In short, we feel that anger is simply wrong, and that when we experience anger, there's something wrong with us. Anger isn't nice. Anger isn't polite. And anger certainly isn't our friend.

Anger can be all of these things. But anger is also useful, necessary and even healing. We need our anger. We simply need to learn how to express our anger in appropriate, conscious, supportive ways. On its own, anger is neither good nor bad. It can be used to hurt, or it can be used to heal. It may not be a particularly pleasant emotion, but it's an important one. We can all benefit from exploringrepparttar nature of anger.

Guy Williams, a friend of mine who also happens to be a minister of Religious Science offers a tremendously insightful approach for understanding anger. Guy says that anger arises from a communication not delivered or an expectation not met. Anger is actually a tertiary response: our initial responses are grief and fear. First, we grieverepparttar 122239 death ofrepparttar 122240 expectation that was not met. Next, we fear that things will never change. Finally, we experience anger.

So few of us recognize that anger can be a positive, healing response. When we allow ourselves to experience anger, it focuses our minds, and strengthens our resolve. We discover reserves of strength and power. Our anger is what gives usrepparttar 122241 courage andrepparttar 122242 power to confront our fear that things will never change, by creating change.

Let's consider an example. We expect that our boundaries will be

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