How have you tried to change in past? Have you actually changed habits? What do you know now about change?

GROUNDWORK FOR CHANGE

The first key in creating groundwork is imaging yourself AFTER change has been accomplished. If you cannot see yourself as a stronger, more fit person, you will never be able to begin and continue exercise to get yourself there. If you cannot see yourself as a non-smoker, it will not happen. So begin to visualize new you in detail. See change in your imagination. (This will also bring up your awareness of gains and losses in this change and give you time to grieve losses.)

Would a visual clue remind you of commitment? How about using an old picture of a slimmer you? How about creating a symbol of what you can do when you no longer smoke—hiking or playing with young people?

Your perspective on change can also be a roadblock. Some of my clients are not comfortable doing things for themselves. They sacrifice to care for another but not for themselves. Eating right or making time for refreshing activity are gifts to you, and not selfish at all. How can you make time for YOU? A change in perspective is needed.

Second, a good plan is essential as well as a support system of people to call if you fall off wagon. You will want to reward yourself, too. A client who stopped smoking decided to buy a magazine, paint her nails, or go out for coffee. Small things, for sure, but a celebration of her progress. For years, I knew I wanted to meditate daily. I would do a session on couple of mornings and then fall out of habit. Then I took a course where I made a promise to mediate daily. The external support and accountability was there. I began meditating have been doing it regularly for months.

Who could support you? Friends or family members who encourage you are great. You may also want to consider a coach. A life coach is a neutral person who can provide support and accountability and be a catalyst for change you want.

WHAT DO YOU VALUE?

(Although this article is geared towards small business owners, information is just as applicable to a similar personal situation, only action is slightly different.)

Here is scenario. You have begun your day at work. Your day is planned ahead, with big challenges first. You want to finish these up, get them out of way and take a little time off this afternoon for yourself. You deserve and need it to stay your best for your family, yourself and your customers.

Just as you get into your first task of morning, phone rings. "I need help right now!" It's Joe Blow, your most troublesome customer (friend).

For last six months, Joe has been coming to you with his problems (never challenges or opportunities) expecting you to drop everything and help him. From very beginning you realized it was probably a mistake to have taken Joe on as a customer. No matter how much you charge Joe for your services, Joe will never be satisfied, and you will never make a profit.

Joe, and customers like him, seem to have an innate ability to attract problems as honey does bees. Of course he blames everyone else, waits until last minute, and calls you to bail him out.

What do you do?