Lots of people carry such baggage for a long time, some even for a lifetime. The sooner you can truly let go of this baggage, less likely you are to recreate bad situations in current and future relationships.

Dropping this baggage is what I call "getting complete."

How do you get complete? Completion is not a sense or an emotion or even a state of being, but a process. This means there are steps and practical actions that will get you to completion. What stands between you and having a great relationship is acting on these steps.

At most basic level, completion is an exercise in communication. Imagine you could finally say everything you needed to say to everyone you needed to say it to, no holds barred. Wouldn't that give you a great sense of relief and freedom? In essence, getting complete is getting to communicate everything to everyone, without spending your life looking for everyone from your past or having to deal with less-than-receptive people.

I bet you said yes. Who doesn't have something in their past they want to put to rest? Then let's talk about what action steps you can take to create absence of past -- or completion -- in your life.

Below are a series of action steps. You'll want to pick a few and repeat them until you are complete with various people and circumstances from your past.

The time it takes to get to genuine completion will vary from person to person and situation to situation. For some it can come quickly. But sometimes completion happens over time: we may have to forgive, let go, or communicate to people in stages over a period of time.

Here are 10 action steps to put to rest people and situations from your past. Use these action steps on list of incompletions you created from last week's article.

1. Write Letters Write letters to person or people to whom you feel resentful, hurt, or still attached. Freely say everything you want to say and write as many letters as necessary to feel complete, each time going deeper inside to express your full emotions. Do not send these letters, but instead do something with them that leads you to feel you are getting rid of feelings. Flush letters down toilet, burn them, bury them, etc.

2. Tell Your Story Tell your story over and over to a trusted friend, advisor, or your journal. Make sure neither you nor person listening edit or judge what you say or write, give advice, or make comments to dispute your feelings. Your job is to communicate and be listened to attentively.

3. Talk to Right Person Talk to person with whom you have incompletion. Do this only if you are sure person will be able to listen to you in same way as in Step 2 above. If you do have this conversation, make sure not to blame or be rude, but talk about your feelings and consequences in your life. If you have opportunity, have as many conversations as you need to get complete.

4. Imagine Talking to Right Person If conversation in Step 3 above is not feasible, have this conversation in your imagination. Give conversation as much time and undivided attention as you would give a real conversation. This works best as a closed eye meditation/visualization.