Booty Grabbing at Your Place of Worship?

Written by Nancy R. Fenn


"Many of us, however, flinch at 'the peace'. It spoilsrepparttar privacy and dignity of worship, and we dread it likerepparttar 123095 onslaught ofrepparttar 123096 dentist's drill." -- Letter to "The London Telegraph"

Recently I've had some interesting conversations with an introvert inrepparttar 123097 Midwest whose minister tries to grab him and hug him onrepparttar 123098 way out of church every Sunday and I got to thinking ... how prevalent is this situation? Hasrepparttar 123099 recent trend toward hugging in American churches destroyedrepparttar 123100 experience of community worship forrepparttar 123101 typical introvert?

This is not an article about faith or God, or really even about booty,repparttar 123102 humorous title. It's an article about introverts and how we relate to others in social situations. Does your church or place of worship call itself "the hugging church"? Are you "invited" to stand up and turn around half way throughrepparttar 123103 service to share "the peace" with people you don't know?

My Midwestern friend has decided to speak bluntly to his minister and tell him to keep his hands to himself. I wonder that he hasn't considered changing churches. Few take offence at a soft handshake or nod, but even so, a polite "no thank you" will also suffice.

This uninvited touchy-feely stuff is not pleasing to an introvert and it's not that we're "cold" or "strange". Not at all. What we are is territorial. We're as territorial about our bodies and our body space as we are about our physical and emotional space. It's one of our strongest characteristics. If you want to know for sure whether or not you're an introvert, ask yourself one of these two questions, "Do people exhaust me?" and/or " How would I feel if someone sat down at my desk and started checking their email?"

It's our right as introverts to be territorial. We are a legitimate personality type.

Here are some comments from parishioners of churches of various denominations on this topic. As you read these statements, pay attention to how you feel.

Remember, it's OK not to like hugging or "glad-handing" as my introverted grandfather used to call it disdainfully. This doesn't make you a bad person.

COMMENTS FROM PARISHIONERS Meta Minton, editor of "The Southern Illinoisan": "On occasion, I attend a local, holly roller, hallelujah screaming, speaking in tongues, praying until you pass out, Pentecostal church. The congregation there is very warm and loving. Any service you attend, it is guaranteed that you will get hugged by everyone at least once."

Anonymous: "We've witnessed a trend in whichrepparttar 123104 new, contemporary churches -- where video screens and guitars arerepparttar 123105 norm -- seem to be bursting atrepparttar 123106 seams. The parking lots at those churches don't seem to be large enough for all those flocking in to hearrepparttar 123107 message. Atrepparttar 123108 other end ofrepparttar 123109 spectrum, many ofrepparttar 123110 more traditional churches have slowly seen their numbers slide. Churches must change or they'll die...."

From "The London Telegraph": "What is troubling isrepparttar 123111 practice of some members ofrepparttar 123112 congregation of approachingrepparttar 123113 event with more gusto. These hearties do double hand-shakes like boxers atrepparttar 123114 start of a bout. Wearing moony smiles and saying 'the peace' with soppy sincerity, they leaprepparttar 123115 nave to greet strangers with full-bosomed embraces, sometimes even renderingrepparttar 123116 victim breathless for several moments. 'Turn around and say hello to one another,' would berepparttar 123117 standard invitation fromrepparttar 123118 platform, at which point arms would be flung around anyone and everyone, whether they looked like they wanted a hug or not."

Pastor Bob of Xxx Church in Michigan: "The church is a place for hugging. I see it on Sunday mornings during our time of fellowship. I see hugging inrepparttar 123119 Gold Room during coffee time. Our church is a good hugging church. In baseball, they have a DH - a designated hitter who bats instead ofrepparttar 123120 pitcher. At our church, we also have a DH - a designated hugger. I don't think she's even 5 feet tall, but this little dynamo, otherwise known as Xxx, is our DH. She hugs everyone with a smile on her face and love in her heart. "Bend over, Darlin', and give me a hug."

From "The London Telegraph": Mr. Moore, in his guise as a modern British Episcopalian, may be prepared to tolerate such assaults. Many of us, however, flinch at "the peace". It spoilsrepparttar 123121 privacy and dignity of worship, and we dread it likerepparttar 123122 onslaught ofrepparttar 123123 dentist's drill."

The Encounter

Written by Gloria Minatti


As I sit staring outrepparttar window contemplating about my past I am moved with sadness because I may soon loserepparttar 123094 privilege of enjoyingrepparttar 123095 pleasures of life. I was just diagnosed two weeks ago with cervical cancer. My whole life I thought I would see my kids grow up, and have children of their own. Now this may all be just a fantasy. I believed in God, but never really had a true relationship with Him. Always scurrying about with my daily routine, it became difficult to be still. With soccer practice and assignments at work, there was never really any time to sit down and meditate onrepparttar 123096 goodness of God. It seemed to farfetched to me. At this moment looking at creation right outside my window has brought me to a place of solitude. Not because I wanted it, but life seem to have its own ideas for me. So I succumbed to its call, and began forrepparttar 123097 first time in years - to pray.

Forrepparttar 123098 first time I had to believe in something or someone other than myself. I have always been independent. I never felt a need to trust in any source other than myself. Time after time I wasrepparttar 123099 one who lifted others up when they were down, and gave when there was a need. Now it was my turn, and my pride would not let me ask for help. I felt so alone. I didn’t know what I was going to do. I didn’t even know how to pray, but remembered that someone told me that God hears us. I returned my gaze back intorepparttar 123100 house and looked around. I begin to sum up all that I had accumulated overrepparttar 123101 years, and found that it was not nearly as important now as it was then.

I got married young atrepparttar 123102 age of 21, and had a son. Atrepparttar 123103 time of my marriage I already had a son. I was pregnant my senior year in high school, and was determined to make it out of there. I graduated and received my diploma. Now I was faced withrepparttar 123104 real challenge of life, raising a child alone. So whenrepparttar 123105 man I married came along it was like a gift from God. He was willing to take on this responsibility and provide for us both. Things were so mush easier then. Whenever there was a financial problem, or something broke down inrepparttar 123106 house. He would immediately take charge and all would be taken care of. Now he was gone. He past away last year from liver cancer, and now I was alone again.

There wasn’t much money, and I didn’t even have health insurance. I was atrepparttar 123107 end of myself, and wondered if I could even getrepparttar 123108 words out to even ask God for anything. What would I ask Him for? How would He receive me after I had been neglecting Him all these years? My heart was so heavy today, and I wasn’t inrepparttar 123109 mood to have company. My family wanted to come over and have a family dinner. We hadn’t done this in quite awhile, so we decided this was a good time as any. I didn’t tell them about my condition yet, because I didn’t want to be treated as if I had leprosy or something. I know that it would be good intentions coming forth, but it was my pride raring its ugly head up again.

My mother was in Florida, and so beingrepparttar 123110 oldest I had to holdrepparttar 123111 family together. I had four sisters, and they were all my half sisters. I always felt like an outcast ever since I found out that my father wasn’t my father. What a shock it was to me to know that all those years I was kept inrepparttar 123112 dark. Glancing back over these things as I straighten up a little before my family would come. I always had trials to overcome, but overcome them I did. I prided myself on my inner strength, and others were envious of it. In 1989 I was paralyzed for a year from my neck down. The doctors never found outrepparttar 123113 reason for it, and one day I was able to walk again. When I shared this with a friend who was a minister, she shared with me that it was God’s way of getting my attention. He had my intention for a while, but thenrepparttar 123114 cares ofrepparttar 123115 world started taking over and I forgot all about Him.

That time seemed so long ago now. It is almost oblivious to me. My sons are 18 and 11 now, and able to take care of themselves. There was really no need for me to stay around anymore. I began to recite this in my mind as I vacuumedrepparttar 123116 floors. I never realized atrepparttar 123117 time that I was falling. I was on my way into a downward motion of despair. I didn’t see thatrepparttar 123118 news of this disease overtaking my body, this foreign substance was beginning to overpower me. The feeling of being hedged in was overwhelming me. I felt as if I would faint, when at that moment I felt a presence. It was a presence I had never experienced before. It was real though, as if a literal person was standing there beside me. I turned to look inrepparttar 123119 direction that I feltrepparttar 123120 small breeze coming at my back. There was no one there. At least no one I could see with my natural eyes.

I felt it nevertheless, and it didn’t frighten me. I had heard of people having out of body experiences or angels appearing to them; but never in my finite mind would I ever have imagined it would happen to me. I turnedrepparttar 123121 vacuum off, and stood completely still. My body began to shake uncontrollably, and I then became frightened. Not because ofrepparttar 123122 presence, but of what was happening to me. I had never experienced anything like this before. There was no one at home with me atrepparttar 123123 time, so this was a perfect opportunity for this to occur.

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