Written by B. Blitterlees & E. Craboon

Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005

CALENDAR OF ODD EVENTS -- Eccentric events and odd occasions to celebrate in June 2005 –

If June is “bust’n out all over”, you’re probably a green-thumb type, a frisky cowpoke, or perhaps just a “Hot Foot powder” aficionado.

Onrepparttar other hand, maybe you’re one of those testy technical types who are rather relieved to know that we’re half way throughrepparttar 140578 Gregorian calendar.

Besides celebrating “Clean Air” day (time to let those soiled socks in one’s bottom drawer seerepparttar 140579 light of day), it’s also time to honor fathers everywhere by giving them a token of your appreciation …a frigging flyswatter!

So without further adieu, before bidding a fond farewell, and oodles of glad-handing good-byes…perhaps take a glance at one’s in store forrepparttar 140580 jolly month of June.

June 1 – CLEAN AIR APPRECIATION DAY (Time to honor those with a compelling need to air their dirty linen in public or engage in a natural urge to break wind in elevators).

June 2 – NO IMPROVEMENT NECESSARY DAY (For all those “I’m all right Jack/Jill” people you know who are fine and dandy justrepparttar 140581 way they are thank you!)

June 3 – PLAY WITH YOUR FOOD DAY (Vanquishing one’s veggies, eating giggling Jell-O with a fork and mashed mayhem never looked like so much fun!)

June 4 – GEMINI APPRECIATION DAY (Time to honor all those heavenly twins you know who are also restless, impractical, gossipy, nervous and a tad capricious or fickle).

June 5 – SUCCESS OBJECT RECOGNITION DAY (Time to flaunt whatever makes you feel like a King or Queen including your newly renovated throne room if you wish).

June 6 – NATIONAL KICK-THE-CAN DAY (Whenrepparttar 140582 going gets tough, it’s nice to know one can harrumph, utter a hearty grunt, or kickrepparttar 140583 daylights out of a trash can).

June 7 – INTERNATIONAL BELLY-DANCING DAY (It’s never too late to flaunt your flab, wag your tail and dorepparttar 140584 hoochy-koochy ‘cause that’s what life’s all about!)

June 8 – SANDBOX APPRECIATION DAY (Time to whip outrepparttar 140585 shovels, pails, beach balls and water balloons; play fair …no pulling hair and no tattle-tales please!)

June 9 – JUG BAND DAY (For all those folks who can’t hold a tune but can play a kazoo, a pennywhistle, and drum on pots…now who says that aint’ music!)

June 10 – NATIONAL TOOTH FAIRY APPRECIATION DAY (In honor ofrepparttar 140586 Goddess-of-Grin-&-Bear-It and those who yank chompers all day long for a living).

June 11 – FINGERNAIL FASHION DAY (Time to decorate those delightful digits with clashing colors, stylish sparkle, or perhaps even super-size them for a change!)

June 12 – NOT-YOUR-AVERAGE-ART DAY (A fine way to honorrepparttar 140587 messy munchkin inside you with plenty of papier-mâché, finger-paints, or oodles of play-doh!)

June 13 – TEFLON SUIT APPRECIATION DAY (In honor of those who manage to survive by letting all manner of things slide off their backs and onto someone else’s!)

June 14 – NAUGHTY T-SHIRT DAY (A way to pacifyrepparttar 140588 politically-incorrect people in your life who have a bad habit of buying novelty t-shirts with raunchy, ribald retorts).

I think I'll drop everything and just go fishin'

Written by Rev. James L. Snyder

I said something last week I haven't said in years. Where it came from, I really don't know. It's funny, you're tooling along minding your own business for weeks, maybe months at a time, and then something you haven't thought about for years pops into your noodle.

I don't remember what brought it on, but I blurted out, "I think I'll just quit everything and go fishin'."

Whererepparttar phrase came from is a mystery because I can't rememberrepparttar 140522 last time I went fishing. It's tragic when a person gets so busy he forgets aboutrepparttar 140523 truly essential things of life. There is nothing, in my mind (at least that's my wife's opinion) more essential in life than fishing.

Inrepparttar 140524 heart of my tackle box, I am a true-blue fisherman, especially if it's a cold morning and I am waste deep in frigid water.

Two types of people indulge in this business of fishing.

Some take up fishing as a hobby to get away fromrepparttar 140525 rat race of life. And there is nothing like fishing to do just that.

When at work they think of fishing, and when fishing, they think of work. These are not real fishermen, they just play one on their holidays and no self-respecting sporting goods store should be allowed selling them any fishing tackle.

Then there are those who are born fishermen. It's not something they chose, just like nobody choosesrepparttar 140526 color of their eyes,repparttar 140527 color of their skin or what year they were born n although some fudge here a little. My motto: a little fudge is good for your soul. These are just born fishermen and there is nothing they can do about it. Whether it'srepparttar 140528 sovereignty of God or predestination I'm not sure, I just know it happens.

Sometimesrepparttar 140529 best thing a person can do is drop everything and just go fishing. If more people did this, it might cut down onrepparttar 140530 war and violence in our world.

People need to know several things about "going fishin'" and fishermen in general. Fishermen are an abused minority and grossly misunderstood byrepparttar 140531 general population. As far as I know there is no voice standing up for these poor souls. Maybe its because voices can't stand and then there are some voices I can't stand.

Inrepparttar 140532 first place, fishing has everything to do withrepparttar 140533 equipment n and not just any equipment will do. In some regards, it takes a lifetime to acquirerepparttar 140534 proper equipment to go fishing. This is whererepparttar 140535 true-blue fishermen are greatly misunderstood.

No true-blue fisherman would ever think of going fishing without his lucky hat. Going fishing without your lucky hat is like going to a restaurant without your appetite; what'srepparttar 140536 point?

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