At end of day, though, if your business is to be financially successful (and if you don't care about that, you're engaged in a hobby, not a business), you have to turn a buck. One of most common anxieties expressed by new (and even not so new) online entrepreneurs, though, is that they don't want to come across as "selling something" to those with whom they have forged very relationship that is a prerequisite to actually making sale!

In other words, focus on "relationship marketing" has been so much on relationship that marketing begins to seem crass and a something of a violation of trust. Many new online business owners report that they feel like they're taking advantage of trust of those with whom they have forged a bond. Of course, there's no reason to feel any such thing so long as you believe in what it is you're selling and that it's something that will benefit your customers. If you don't feel this way, then your bad feelings are well placed. You ARE taking advantage!

The discomfort associated with selling is not restricted to business owner, either. I have received several indignant emails over course of past three years I have been in this business from readers of my ezine in response to promotions I have run for programs I actively promote. The recurring theme of these sorts of communications is that I have a "responsibility" to my readers because they've come to rely on me as an authoritative source of information and I have somehow breached this responsibility by doing something so crass as to actually *market* programs I promote to earn part of my online income.

Some have even gone so far as to suggest that, since I accept paid advertising in my ezine, I should be content with that revenue stream and not seek to make money by promoting outside programs. (Of course, these are generally very same people who complain about advertising as well.)

My response to this line of reasoning is simply that I'm running a BUSINESS. I'm not working nights and weekends on my site and on my ezine out of goodness of my heart. I'm just not that noble, trust me. I have a profit motive. Despite what some people seem to think, a profit motive is NOT, in and of itself, a Bad Thing. A profit motive is only a Bad Thing when one misleads, deceives and otherwise takes advantage of trust of another to pursue that profit. There's no reason to apologize or feel guilty for wanting to make an honest profit.

How about you? Do you have just a twinge of uneasiness when it comes to marketing your products and services? Here are some ideas to help you overcome reticence you may feel in pursuing sales from your prospective customers and how to manage these relationships so that your customer understands that, although you are there to help them, you are also out to help yourself by earning an honest living.

CRYSTALLIZE YOUR PURPOSES

The very first thing you need to do is decide what it is you're really doing when you create your website or publish your ezine. Is it a hobby or is it a business? The difference, respectively, is absence or presence of a profit motive. If it's a hobby, fine. Don't try and turn a profit, just enjoy yourself and generate just enough income to cover your expenses (if you can). But if it's a business, understand that making a profit is non-negotiable. It's reason for your business's existence. You will no doubt have several purposes. But profit motive is key.

It happened over thirty years ago. I was a teenager fascinated by powers of mind. I read about spirituality, psychic phenomena, UFO's, past lives, present problems, magic of believing, and yes, even hypnosis.

And that helps explain why I had my best friend, Billy, in a deep trance in basement of my parent's home in Ohio. I had regressed him from age of 16 back to age of four or five. I had no business doing it. But I was curious and Billy was game. It was a remarkable morning until something truly terrifying happened.

I snapped my fingers---the prearranged command to wake Billy up---but he stayed in chair, smiling, eyes closed, and laughing loud and hard.

"How old are you?" I asked, wanting to check his age level.

"Seventy-two, how old are you?!" he replied, laughing like a wild, untamed, truly obnoxious child.

You can't imagine my fear.

"When I slap my hands together, you will awaken," I commanded.

Billy laughed long and loud.

I slapped my hands together.

Billy laughed louder and longer.

I'm panicking now. I'm barely sixteen years old. I have my best friend in a trance, regressed to a young age, and I can't bring him out of it. I could see my parent's rage. I could see Billy's parent's rage. I could see myself locked up, still a teenager, all because I practiced hypnosis like other kids played baseball or monopoly.

I waited. I held my breath. I snapped my fingers. I slapped my hands. I perspired. Billy wasn't coming out of his trance. He was locked into another time period. And I was responsible.

Some kids borrow neighbor's car and wreck it. I borrowed my best friend's mind and put it in park.

What was I going to do?

I don't recall how much time went by before I decided to call for help. I remember going to phone book and desperately searching for a hypnotist to call for help. I found one in Cleveland, Ohio, a hundred miles from my home. I called him, got him on phone, and acted as cool as I could.

"Doctor, my name is Joe, and, well, I've been learning about hypnosis. I was just wondering, what would happen if you put someone in a trance and they, well, er, ah, you know, never came out of it?"

There was silence on line.

Then I remember voice bellowing at me.

"Are you practicing hypnosis there?!"

"Oh, no," I lied. "I was just curious what would happen if, you know, you put your best friend under, regressed him, and he wouldn't come out of it. Is that a bad thing?"

"Is your best friend there now?"

The hypnotist was on to me.

"Well...yes."

"Will he come to phone?"

"He won't do ANYTHING I ask," I said. My voice was cracking now. I was scared and it showed.

"Don't worry about it," hypnotist advised me. "He'll either naturally awaken shortly, or he'll fall asleep and then wake up."

"But he thinks he's five years old," I added.

"YOU KIDS HAVE TO STOP PLAYING AROUND!" he roared.

"But I want to be a hypnotist someday," I explained.

"GET TRAINING FIRST!" he blurted.

"Okay, okay, I will," I said. "But what do I do about Billy?"

"Put him on phone."

I went to Billy, somehow got him to get on phone, and hypnotist said something which helped Billy awaken. To this day I don't know what he said. And since I haven't seen Billy in nearly twenty years, I have no idea how old Billy really thinks he is. I understand he's now a State Trooper in Ohio, so I imagine he's stable and well. Still, I'm staying in Texas.

I learned something profound that day in my parent's basement when my life stopped for an afternoon.

I learned that trances are powerful. They are real. And we are all in them.

That's right. You're in a trance. Yes, right now. So am I. We may not think we're five years old, but we think we are writers, or marketers, or salespeople, or some other "trance." As long as we believe trance we are in, we will play it out perfectly. When we wake up, we'll just be in another trance. Even "I'm now awake" trance is just another trance.

Stay with me here. Whether you disagree or not, there's a valuable lesson here---one that can help you increase your sales and your profits.

In short, your prospects are all in trances. If you merge with their trance, you can then lead them out of it and into "buying trance" you want them to be in.

I'll repeat that: