"The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes." -Marcel ProustThe question of what I want has bubbled up frequently in recent weeks. I've explored many facets of wanting: wanting more, wanting less, wanting something different, wanting what I think I can't have, and
challenge of giving myself permission to want what I want.
In my estimation, here are top eight reasons we don't give ourselves what we want. Hint, hint - this is all about social conditioning - or what you've absorbed from family, friends or "experts" about "the way things should be."
- You've lost touch with what you want and how you feel.
- You're not willing to admit what you want.
- You're afraid of what you want.
- What you want runs headlong into someone else's opposing desires or -- yikes!-- into their fear. This is an "outer critic" showing up.
- Your judgment or someone else's stops you in your tracks.
- Your "inner critic" rears its noisy head, and says "Are you crazy? You don't deserve that!"
- You don't see that you already have what you want.
- You simply can't give yourself permission to want it.
Here's what I'd like you to do right now: Take out a pen and paper and make a list of all that you want, both internally and externally. For example, a more internal desire might be inner peace or self-acceptance, while an external desire might be a fun new sofa or a fun new job. Write whatever comes to mind without any censoring. NO CENSORING. Include everything from wanting new socks to wanting to be more self-aware to wanting to be President of United States. Make it a stretch: If you can comfortably make a list of fifty desires, then make a list of sixty. If one hundred is a piece of cake, I challenge you to create a list of two hundred.
