I always do a lot of thinking about good intentions in December. It's not because I'm inspired by
holidays. I'm simply observing
anniversary of
Universal Declaration of Human Rights. Each year, around December 10th, I reread that incredible document just to remind myself that as humans, we can all agree on what it means to have basic rights and to be treated fairly. It's an inspiring piece of writing, and it fills my heart with hope--that is, until I remember that we don't seem to be making much progress on
goals we set for ourselves 55 years ago.
From
time we're very young, we learn that there is a difference between what we mean to do and what actually happens. After a scuffle, your mother asked, "Did you do it on purpose or by accident?" It was sometimes okay to kick your brother in
teeth as long as you didn't mean to do it--like, say, if you were reaching a toy for him on
top shelf and stepped back wildly on your way down. You were trying to help, you caused pain accidentally, you felt bad about it, so it was excused.
Now that we're adults, are our accidents excused? Do good intentions serve as a sort of "Get out of jail free" card? Not exactly.
Democritus,
Greek philosopher and physicist, said: "My enemy is not
man who wrongs me, but
man who means to wrong me." Tell that to
mother of a child killed by a drunk driver. Bad things happen, even when they are completely unintentional and repulsive to
perpetrators. Negligent homicide isn't intentional, but
results are
same as if
guilty party carefully planned and carried out his attack.
If we watch
news, we see all kinds of examples of good intentions that go terribly wrong. Whether we're talking about
results of a new Walmart or a new war, we can't always get what we want, but if we try real hard, we just might find--we screw things up royally. (apologies to
Rolling Stones)
The latest brain research tells us that it's possible to make things happen by simply having a clear intention. As long as we look in
mirror every day and repeat, "I will become a millionaire and benefactress, feeding
poor with my great wealth", then eventually we'll be writing those fat checks to
local food bank. Unfortunately, those mirror musings don't always focus on
good intentions behind
goal. Given
option of manifesting our destiny, we tend to go with our top choice. The millionaire thing wins out--we can't open door number two (becoming a benefactress) without opening door number one first. Consequently, we end up with a whole lot of people repeating
millionaire mantra every day, and
real intention--giving generously--gets lost in
shuffle.