All You Need Is Love, Is Not True

Written by Dr. Dorree Lynn

The Beatles got it right when they sang: “All you need is love.” But, people tend to get it wrong when they don’t differentiate between being in love and what it takes to have a love relationship. After “kissing a lot of frogs,” hoping your prince or princess will appear, or after a demoralizing dry spell, falling in love seems like a magic potion that will get you throughrepparttar rest of your life.

Being romantically in love feels wonderful. Your beloved seems likerepparttar 126300 most wonderful human being on earth. You are obsessed by him or her day and night,repparttar 126301 world is a shade brighter, and every love song seems to be sung especially for you. Those who have been in love know that it can be a glorious experience that brings outrepparttar 126302 best in you and makes you feel as if you can accomplish almost anything.

But, many of you have also hadrepparttar 126303 experience whererepparttar 126304 feeling of being in love has lead you into a relationship that is diminishing, painful, and has brought outrepparttar 126305 worst in you. Suddenly, or over time, your heavenly feeling is becomes a life of living hell. How can this happen?

People are often confused byrepparttar 126306 feeling of being in love and being in an ever changing love relationship. One can be in love but it does take “two to tango.” A loving relationship requires that both people mutually care about each other. It also requires five big “C’s”: caring, consequences, commitment, conflict resolution, andrepparttar 126307 biggie---all relationships have difficulty continuing without communication.

Caring means both people are genuinely interested inrepparttar 126308 welfare of and desirerepparttar 126309 best forrepparttar 126310 other. To do this you have to realize thatrepparttar 126311 person you love is different from yourself and what pleases them and keeps them happy may not berepparttar 126312 same things that keep you on top ofrepparttar 126313 world.

Education For Our Troubled Times

Written by Dr. Dorree Lynn

The events of September 11th andrepparttar aftermath of anthrax scares and security warnings shattered our illusions and morphed our once familiar world into a new and unfamiliar one. As a result, all of us are learning to live with a newly developing normalcy. Metaphorically speaking, we are only atrepparttar 126299 first stage of this education—taking our preliminary prerequisite classes: Living with Terrorism 101. Living with Anxiety 102. Getting out of Bed and Handling Depression 103. Sleeplessness and Nightmares 104. Intimacy and Caring under Stress 105. Staying sane in an insane world is an extremely difficult task.

Not all our professors and teachers know what they are doing. Not all are easy to understand. And many are neither very likable nor very good educators. The homework is hard and takes time. Making sense out ofrepparttar 126300 often-contradictory news bombardment can seem an overwhelming task. Those of us who pay attention to daily news events are on overload. Every time we think we haverepparttar 126301 hang of what is going on, something new and unexpected develops and with increased confusion, we return to ground zero and have to start our education process all over again.

The government isn’t helping us with our feelings very much. On one hand, they tell us to go on with life as usual—to be cowboys and cowgirls, pull ourselves up by our boot straps and ride on—overcoming any obstacles in our path until, atrepparttar 126302 end ofrepparttar 126303 day, at our proverbial campfires, we lay our weary heads to rest.

Onrepparttar 126304 other hand, using terse abstract terms, officials are issuing dire warnings while providing minimal information that can quell our concerns. In general, these information givers are not yet very good atrepparttar 126305 psychological aspects of their job and most can barely teachrepparttar 126306 introductory courses they have taken on. Psychologist know that in order to ease fear, when you give a warning you also give instructions about how to handlerepparttar 126307 warning. Psychologists also know that a very good way to increase anxiety and erratic behavior, even with rats, is to use intermittent reinforcement schedules. The ambiguity helps to driverepparttar 126308 poor animals crazy.

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