A true roommate story-psyco surferWritten by dan the roommate man
My worst roommate (and I've had some bad ones) was on my semester at Tel-Aviv University. It started on group flight there, with this obnoxious surfer looking guy who was seated next to me (I was on an aisle, he was in middle). On ten hour flight, he had me put something in or take something out of overhead for him at least fifteen or twenty times. He just wouldn't leave me alone, and was constantly begging me to change seats with him, and grab a pen, and put this card in his bag... When we got to dorms and had our orientation meeting, it turned out that I was in same apartment as him, though thank god not same room (each apt was 2 double rooms with a common kitchen and bath).This guy was unreal. He was a bleach-blond surfer, rowed crew, was well over 6' and very muscular (I'm 5'7" and thin), and just a total jerk. He constantly ate food belonging to rest of us, claiming that he had no money, nevermind $100 packages full of crap he'd send back to his girlfriend in CA. After two weeks or so of his constantly disrespecting other three of us, things got a bit tense. The first turning point was when he used an entire pack of my roommate's razors to shave part of his head, and from then on he seemed to be in ever-lessening contact with reality. About a month into his stay, he decided to adopt a stray dog that he found near beach while surfing. This, of course, couldn't happen, because you can't have dogs in dorms, and rest of us weren't too keen on having a stray dog around. Jason, psycho, completely lost it when he was told he couldn't keep dog ("if he goes, I go, because he's only one who understands me"). He got right in my face and threatened to kill me if I turned him in (remember our size and strength disparities...), since I was only one who was home when he came charging in with this poor mutt. Later that day, after security guards and program people told him dog had to go, he took off, and wasn't heard from for a couple of days.
| | A roommate story too strange to make upWritten by dan the roommate man
So it's my fifth (and final) year of undrgrad and I am planning on getting my own place; but right before that happens I get an opportunity to rent a house for a total of $750 month, and this includes utilities. Well, no shit, I'm going to go for it. All I have to do is find two roommates. Well I met some dude (we will refer to him as CrazyBones) in a class semester before. He seemed a little off, but overall we got along and we had been in touch that summer and coincidently he needed a place to stay and he had met someone (we will call him DnD for Drunk and Desperate) who needed a place to stay and this set up worked well at time.Less than a week into semester, CrazyBones decides that he doesn't need to go to class anymore. So this, along with fact he doesn't have a job, provided ample free time for him to sit around in sweat pants and be an all around scrub. As a few weeks went by I could just tell by some small actions and a glint he had in his eye something was definitely not right in this guy's brain. But I'll spare small details and go straight to shit. So it all starts one night when we threw a party. Everything is going fine until about 11pm when one of my buddies says that CrazyBones just ran half party out because he yelled at whoever was in earshot that they were all essentially worthless because they weren't paying attention to his crappy attempt a freestyle rapping (mind you he is 6,4 250 or so lbs and a goony looking white guy). I took this with a grain of salt and continued having a good time until about 4am when some dude comes into basement all bloody and says I need to take CrazyBones to hospital. oh, shit.....Well apparently two had gotten in a massive fight in CrazyBones' room and there was blood everywhere and a window was broken and his hand was sliced up pretty bad. So I drive him to hospital and I wait in lobby as he is being attended to. And after about an hour he comes out having stole a bunch of hospitals crap saying they were taking too long and he was going to deal with it himself. He disappeared next morning and eventually subsided a few days later fixed up. I don't know and don't want to. Maybe a week or so after that I come downstairs to find all furniture we had had (which was mostly his) he moved to basement, where he set up shop and reversed lock so only he could get in. At this time he is hanging around some pretty shady people (he always did, but these were even worse) going in and out of house. All he is doing is hanging out in basement and maybe he would run an errand or two during week. Mind you he isn't going to class and has no job. And there are empty bottles of prescription pills everywhere.
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