1. Don't answer phone. Isn't that why God made answering machines and teenagers? Take calls on YOUR schedule instead of everyone else's. Ask friends and family not to call during certain hours. Don't be rude; just explain that you're trying to make your time work for you instead of against you. We all have same 24 hours. You can either live it according to everyone else's schedule, or you can decide when and how you will use your own time. Put life on YOUR schedule, instead of just reacting to next thing that catches your attention.

2. Don't accept an invitation to a party. If it's one Saturday you have free that month, and you really want to spend it alone with your spouse, or working on a personal project, say no thank you with love and grace. By saying no to others, you have said yes to your marriage and to yourself. Remember that you always have options, and you are always at choice. It's unrealistic to think that everyone will hate you if you don't attend a party. Don't lose sight of big picture.

3. Don't make bed. No, this is not an invitation to become Mr&Ms. Sloppy. While I'm a 100% advocate on how a cluttered environment affects a cluttered mind, all I'm really suggesting here is to dump "good girl/good guy" routine for a while. And don't use excuse, "that's just way I am." Try retraining yourself to be a little looser. Does it really matter if you leave dishes in sink? Or does it really matter that you spend extra 5 minutes listening to your child's story. Realize that you are still just as loveable even if you aren't perfect.

I have a certain set of relatives, on my wife's side, that will make a good example here. They often find cause to be jealous of what I have and therefore don't like me very much. It's obvious what their problem is, however, and there's not much I can do about it.

They have a lower standard of what is 'good enough' than my wife and I do. When my wife and I talk about future, it contains plans for a larger log home, money for kids for college or whatever they want to do, time spent traveling, camping, hunting and fishing, a new van, and being able to help others out that need it.

Now, we aren't where we want to be yet, but in mean time we do have a good home, a good car, we do get in some traveling and camping, and we are working toward improving things for future.

When visiting these relatives, however, I hear and see same things over and over.

"Well, this house may not be much, but at least I own it and it's good enough." (It's a beat up old single wide trailer with an open 35 gallon trash can right in middle of living room and a cattle trough for a bathtub.)

"I ain't getting rich with this job, but at least it pays bills, and that's good enough." (He makes $7.50 an hour and gets laid off 3 months every winter)