There are various reasons for this but here we single out 6 of those. Every young person who is planning marriage should be aware of these most common pitfalls.

1. Marrying for sake of love without first checking depth of love.

No denying that all relationships start with a sense of love and mutual liking. Committing to a long term relationship like marriage solely on basis of that feeling of love is a mistake. Because most of time this kind of feeling is superficial and can not pass test of time. Romantic feeling dies as time passes and far more important issues like 'family background', 'values', 'religious faith', 'financial stability' raise their head, and these issues are of real importance which almost every body with feeling of mutual love ignore.

2. Marrying someone who does not share an interest or hobby.

While marriage with a person who does not share an interest or hobby does not itself make marriage unstable, presence of such an interest or hobby can make life more enjoyable for both partners. And this can make a real difference so while selecting life partner this aspect must be taken into account. But for some reason or other this aspect is often overlooked before marriage. And efforts start after marriage to adapt partner to one's own interest or develop a new common interest. While that is not an impossible task, process of adapting may become un- palatable and may lead to unstable marriage.

3. Not knowing what questions to ask for checking compatibility.

The STOP Strategy is a process I teach all couples and families I work with in my family therapy practice. It's a simple method for stopping hurt, disconnecting so you don't cause harm, cooling down until you're both thinking straight again, and reconnecting from a better place.

The best way to learn how The STOP Strategy works is to read through this article (when you're calm) so you'll understand how it works when you really need it. Once you understand four steps, practice using strategy whenever little things come up between you and your partner. That way, you'll know steps by heart when something big happens.

This strategy not only works with couples, it also works great with kids. What's different here is that The Stop Strategy isn’t designed for just one person. It’s designed for two (and could be used by more). And unlike a typical Time Out--where one person banishes or abandons another—with STOP Strategy, a Time Out begins with two people agreeing to separate in order to come back together after both have done some work on themselves.

This is where healing begins. During a Time Out, both people are expected to reflect their own behavior and are asked to take responsibility for having done things that may have hurt someone else. They’re also asked to think of what they could have done to make things better. The last step requires both people to make a Peace Offering, a gesture that restores a spirit of goodwill to relationship.

Here are four steps:

1. STOP! As soon as you notice yourself getting uncomfortable with way your conversation is going, STOP! Then say: I need a time out. This gives you a chance to take a break without blaming your partner for your discomfort.

2. TIME OUT. This means physically separating from each other in order to stop hurt. It means going away for 30-60 minutes and coming back after both of you have calmed down and have completed Step 3.

• Brain researchers have found that once heart is beating 95 bpm or above, thinking brain shuts down and emotional brain takes over. This means it does no good to keep arguing when you’re both upset, because reasonable part of your brain is no longer listening.

• John Gottman’s research on marital satisfaction found that couples who disengage when things start heating up, and try again after both people are calmer, stay together and report greater satisfaction in their relationships.

Techniques for calming yourself down: Going for a walk, taking a hot bath, listening to quiet music, writing in a journal.

3. OWN YOUR PART. This means taking responsibility for your part in creating problem instead of attacking your partner or defending your position. To do this, answer following questions:

Q: Have I engaged in any acts of overt muscling?