The work around a house or apartment has got to be some of least thanked work ever created. Whether it is yard work on weekend, plumbing as it arises, daily dishes & errand running, we tend to overlook assistance that our spouse and children offer us regularly.Part of why being at home is so tiring for some is simple fact that ongoing work of maintaining regular life is hardly regarded as special.
We don’t forget to say thank you for trips to Hawaii, or Prague (gift love-language).
We sparkle with delight after a full body massage (touch love-language).
We treasure all those times of close one-on-one talks (quality time love-language).
But what about gifts of service? Do we appreciate those?................. sometimes.
When someone in your house regularly contributes to existence of household—be sure to commend them. The trick is that you need to give back appreciation/love in a way that they recognize it.
Find out number 1 love language of family member that is contributing to your household running smoothly. Then show them love by speaking that language to them. For instance, lets say your husband mows lawn and fixes electrical problems around house. He also irons, walks dog, changes baby in middle of night, and waxes your car by hand after every wash. Now, he is obviously contributing love to you and family through language of gifts of service.
Does that mean you are to do service back to him so he can feel loved too? Sometimes. In some cases being tended to or waited on will help him feel loved and reciprocated to. However, he may have grown up watching his dad do those things and merely believes that is way to show love. This may be one way he contributes but doesn’t prove it is his love language.
Do a study on him. Find out what his PRIMARY love language is so that when he contributes to household in anyway—you will have ideas of how to appropriately show your appreciation.
Reason I bring this up = If you show appreciation in one of 4 secondary love languages that rank below your husbands primary love language--- he may not fully feel appreciated. He may eventually feel taken advantage of, and slowly over time he may decrease his input in this way. So, if you want help to continue be sure to show your appreciation in HIS primary language.