So we teach and re-teach as child moves between levels one and two, and then one beautiful day, child is working at third level of obedience.

Let's take an example of making a bed. At first level, child is shown how to make a bed. The child shows willingness by trying to make bed next morning. The bedspread is hanging too low on one side and there are lumps. Being friendly with error, adult simply states, "You made bed by yourself."

The next day child forgets to make bed. The adult gives another demonstration, wordlessly looking at both sides of spread to make sure they are even. The next day child makes bed. The fourth day child forgets to make bed. The adult reminds child, and child goes cheerfully to make bed. If child protests, adult simply smiles and says "Let's do it together," knowing that child may have forgotten how to do it.

After a few days child can make bed with just a verbal reminder. At some point, weeks, months or years, child will reach third level and make bed perfectly without any reminders. (Parents of teenagers are allowed to roll their eyes if still waiting on this third level of obedience.)

All of us learn faster and better in a trusting relationship. Trust is developed by offering assistance in a clear, concise and kind manner. The adult doesn't ask child to do something that is too difficult or belittle child for not being able to do it. The adult remembers that it takes many reteachings to get to second level of obedience and much practice to arrive at third level.

The adult needs to observe child's will, skill and experience levels before asking them to do something. We can offer assistance to child, keeping in mind "any unnecessary help is a hindrance."

For three- to six-year-old, these levels of skill, experience and obedience are changing daily. As adults, we need to remain "friendly with error" as child's experience and memory propel them to third level of obedience, an obedience built on a relationship of trust and mutual respect.

Kids Talk is a column dealing with early childhood development issues written by Maren Stark Schmidt. Mrs. Schmidt founded a Montessori school and holds a Masters of Education from Loyola College in Maryland.

She has over 20 years experience working with young children and holds teaching credentials from Association Montessori Internationale.

Ask your local newspaper to carry Kids Talk. Call, write or e-mail your local newspaper editor and recommend Kids Talk.

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If your child has a television or computer in his or her room, consider removing it permanently. You can console them by saying, "Too bad. Why don't you get something from your activity shelf?" They might cry and complain, but remain cheerful and direct them to their activity center.

To optimize their learning, children need to use their hands and heads together. Granted, television can give good information, but watching it robs our children of hands-on activities that develop important skills such as drawing, building, sewing and reading, to only name a few.

Using an activity center, they will become active, imaginative learners instead of passive learners. I challenge you to turn off your television for one week. It takes a bit of planning, but I think you will discover something wonderful.

Robin marveled at changes in her children, and they went more than a month without television. Robin told me, "After a week, they didn't even ask about it." It could happen to you. Happy parenting!

(Helpful hint for world peace: If Dad has to watch game, ask a friend to have him over.)

Favorite Salt Dough Recipe 1-cup flour 1/2-cup salt 1-cup water 1-tablespoon cream of tartar 1-tablespoon oil

Stir and cook ingredients in a saucepan until rubbery. Knead slightly. Food coloring may be added. Cool and store in a plastic container.

Kids Talk is a column dealing with early childhood development issues written by Maren Stark Schmidt. Mrs. Schmidt founded a Montessori school and holds a Masters of Education from Loyola College in Maryland.

She has over 20 years experience working with young children and holds teaching credentials from Association Montessori Internationale. She is also Creative Director for a video-based reading series for children ages three to six, The Shining Light Reading Series. Contact her via e-mail at maren@shininglightreading.com.

Visit http://www.shininglightreading.com for more information.

Ask your local newspaper to carry Kids Talk. Call, write or e-mail your local newspaper editor and recommend Kids Talk.

Would you like to send Kids Talk to friends and family or receive Kids Talk e-mail updates in your own inbox? Sign up for FREE here: http://www.shininglightreading.com/enews.html

©KIDS TALK™ 925 N.W. Hoyt #532 Portland, OR 97209 503.274.9788 maren@comcast.net

Maren Schmidt is Creative Director for a video-based reading series for children ages three to six, The Shining Light Reading Series. Contact her via e-mail at maren@shininglightreading.com.

Visit http://www.shininglightreading.com for more information.