Every day, all around you, you see people who can’t handle themselves. They’re perfectly well-equipped to handle work portions of their jobs, but they sabotage themselves, projects, and others because they lack emotional intelligence.

People who are low in emotional intelligence: ·Are abrasive, arrogant, or hostile ·Are perfectionists who hold themselves and everyone else back ·Lose their tempers and pollute work field with negative emotions ·Shut down under pressure and become rigid ·Alienate coworkers, customers and clients ·Mismanage themselves and others ·Lose focus when swamped with emotions they can’t handle ·Operate from a fear-based perspective ·Fail to get in loop because of low social skills, and ‘the loop’ is where it all happens ·Have no leadership skills ·Lack creativity and flexibility to generate alternative solutions and problem-solve effectively ·Cannot cope with unpredictable ·Are unable to communicate effectively with those around them ·Do not have resilience necessary to withstand rejections, losses and failures or everyday work life ·Are cynical and pessimistic, an attitude which discourages any kind of positive action and accomplishment both in them and in others ·Can’t handle stress and anxiety ·Take more sick days and produce less when they’re present ·Agitate, gossip, bully and harass others ·Are too afraid to take risks that bring results

Developing your emotional intelligence competencies is one of best things you can do for yourself and for your future. It will benefit you in all areas of your life, with long-term results. How can you forget resilience once you’ve learned it? Or creativity? Or authenticity?

You’ve taken care of your education, training and experience. Now take care of social skills that will let you stand out and get ahead. It’s what personal and professional development is all about.

Another client was seeking motivation for regular exercise. She decided her husband’s photo when he was a baby would keep her focused on getting into shape to begin a family.

I tried for years to be more disciplined about eating sweets. It would work for a while, and then I’d fall back into old habits. Then, I received a cholesterol reading above 200. This did not match my view of myself as healthy. I immediately stopped eating sweets and many white carbohydrates (potatoes, white bread, pasta, and rice). The change was immediate because test facts did not fit my view of me.

WATCH YOUR THOUGHTS

Your mind is another place to look when you want to make changes. What are you telling yourself about area of concern? Are you eating incessantly (or smoking or working) and then feeling guilty about your choices? Are things you say to yourself in your head meaner than you'd say to any other living being?

Many people believe that our thoughts produce our world. So be watchful of your thoughts. Be as gentle with yourself as you would with a small child or a favorite pet. You deserve same love you give others, even when your habits don’t live up to your own ideal. You can start to make a change by altering your thoughts. This is power of affirmations. Begin thinking differently and groundwork is laid to act differently.

A David Schumacher says, “So, if there are things in your life with which you are unhappy, solution, very simply and bluntly stated, is to change your thoughts. You are not a puppet on a string; you have freedom of choice and free will, so recognize this and use it to your advantage, not to your disadvantage. Mind becomes matter; it manifests itself as things in your life and as conditions in your body…”

SUMMARY

1. Notice if you are looking for life lessons in your experiences. Are you open? 2. Visualize yourself after change. Use an image as a daily reminder of new you. 3. Make a plan and gather a support system. 4. Examine your perspective on change. 5. Connect change to a higher value. 6. Be aware of your thoughts and discouraging self-talk. Choose positive affirmations. 7. Move ahead despite any fears of failure (or success). Taking action when fear is present is a great confidence booster.

Keys to Kingdom, Five Fundamentals of Truth, “Mind Power” by David L. Schumacher.

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