“Enjoy it,” said Melanie, who’s been married a year now. “It’s good part.”

Hundreds of books have been written about dating, and thousands of songs have been written about falling in love. It’s a delicious craziness, if done right. We meet, chemistry good and magic starts. We put on rose-colored glasses. Our bodies are pumped full of dopamine, or whatever it is, and we grin, look starry-eyes, love everyone and love life, love ourselves, love … love … love.

Don’t get so focused on goal, you forget to enjoy process. Yes you will eventually get her to bed. Yes he will eventually marry you. In meantime, remember some of fundamentals, and have a good time!

1.Flowers, candy, candles, sunsets – add all beautiful touches 2.Talk romantic. Read some poetry for some ideas. No woman will complain if you tell her she’s always on your mind and in your heart. 3.If you’re serious, make it a date, pick her up, be on time, and you pay. If you’re not serious, don’t call me! Meeting her at theater, or planning to run into her at club are NOT same thing. Going dutch treat signals either friendship, or confusion, which is worse. 4.Give each other small, meaningful gifts. Booking a restaurant just for two of you and filling room with fresh roses is for movies. Fortunately most of us can’t afford it, because it’s “protesting too much.” It smacks of low self-esteem. A single red rose, given with confidence and a deep look into her eyes goes a lot further. 5.Be you, but be best you. Clean up your car, your stinky socks, your language and your behavior. You know what I mean! If not, read Emily Post or get some coaching. 6.Give your date your full attention. There is nothing we crave more. I’ve asked to be taken home when guy answered his cell phone at dinner. I’m sure I’m not only one who has. 7.Use manners. If you’re guy, open door for her, pull out her chair at restaurant, hold out your arm and usher her into a room. If you’re woman, let him do this and then show your appreciation. 8.Don’t be easy. Don’t be easy falling into bed, of course, but also don’t be easy about revealing everything about yourself. Allow some mystery and some waiting. It will mean more in end. We value what is scarce, what is hard to get. 9.If you’re a woman, put him through his traces. If you don’t expect anything special from him, you won’t get it when dating, and it will be worse once you’re married. Make it clear nothing about you is to be taken for granted. 10.What shouldn’t be taken for granted? Not who you are, that’s a constant, but I mean special things you do to honor someone else. That you open door for her should never be taken for granted. That you cook a delicious meal at your home and set a romantic table for him is not your “role,” it’s you being good to him, and should be appreciated.

In sum, it’s about time, and art. Take your time, and also take THE time. Time is our scarcest commodity and how you parcel it out shows what you value. Give your time and full attention to all elements of dating and to person.

It’s an art. Set stage. You now how when a jeweler wants to sell you a diamond, he carefully takes out a small square of black velvet with a flourish, then places it under beautiful lighting, and gently lays ring on it? Every gesture, and every part of presentation is about this is a very valuable thing I am going to show you. I value it and I’m showing you this by how I treat it. Watch me. So don’t leave out flourishes, special touches, single rose, coy peck on cheek with a promise of more and better to come. Whatever your ultimate goal in dating, make process long and memorable.

And P.S. Keep it up after your married.

For my friend Len who works at video store, having low cost health insurance coverage for himself and his family was essential. Moreover, because he is a huge movie buff free video rentals allow him to thoroughly enjoy his hobby without breaking bank. He also receives discounts on any videos or games he wants to purchase as well as free videos, posters, and other goods that company needs to clear out. Len says that working at video rental store is a perfect fit for him since he is such a movie buff and was in need of health insurance.

Another friend, Kathy routinely enjoys eating meals at her favorite restaurant and feels that dining out adds value to her life. She gets to eat her favorite dishes for free without spending an average of $20 per meal, common at her restaurant. She also receives a discount when dining with friends or family at restaurant. Kathy says that benefits of working part-time more than pay for minimum number of hours she is required to work.

2.What hobbies, goods, and activities do you tend to spend most money on?

By answering this question, you’ll be able to determine which companies would be most suitable as potential part-time places of employment. For example, if you like to ski then good choices would be to seek a part-time position at a ski resort or ski shop. If you like movies like Len, then a video rental store or a movie theater is a good bet. If you are like me and place a high value on decorating your home and purchasing nice clothing then a national retail store (one you normally shop) is a good option. If you like to dine out frequently like Kathy, then your favorite restaurants are great places to start. If books are your passion working at your favorite bookstore will get you a nice discount on books and other items sold at store.

To determine which companies and benefits would make a good fit for you simply call each of your targeted companies and ask. This is how I found out about benefits of store I work at and ultimately selected it over other retail stores.

Regardless of what your hobby, activity, or need is, there is a company out there that is in dire need of good part-time employees and will be more than willing to provide you with a flexible schedule and great fringe benefits for working a minimum number of hours. So next time you think moonlighting is just a way to make extra money, it could actually be an excellent way to save money. By looking at big picture you’ll be able to see that what you don’t receive in pay can be more than made up for in money-saving benefits.