Before walking toward pews, usher should ask which side of church she would like to be seated on, bride’s or groom’s. Generally, right side of church is reserved for guests of groom. Her relatives and friends are usually escorted to right.

In a Jewish ceremony, this seating arrangement is reversed. And if one side appears to be filling up and other side has noticeably few occupants, then this rule should be abandoned for sake of appearances.

Incidentally, in keeping with spirit of occasion, ushers should not escort guests to their seats in total silence, as if this were a solemn affair. This is a time for a few casual and friendly, yet dignified and quiet remarks.

Pews are filled from front to back, leaving first several reserved for family members and close friends of bride and groom. Just minutes before ceremony is scheduled to begin, two of ushers should escort groom’s mother and then bride’s mother to their seats. After ceremony, they escort these ladies down aisle.

It is groomsmen who should be available to assist bride’s mother with any last minute details. Just before bride makes her entrance, they should unroll aisle runner. Another important duty of these men of chivalry is to arrange for transportation of bridesmaids to wedding site.

After ceremony, as everyone heads off to reception, it is their responsibility to ensure that no one is left behind. And, because they are largely responsible for making sure that a good time is had by all, they are expected to introduce guests to each other.

Modern day armor

What groomsmen wear is largely determined by formality or informality of ceremony, and to a lesser extent by considerations such as location and time of day.

These days, most grooms, groomsmen and ushers rent their formalwear. The groom and his men should order their tuxes at least three months before wedding. If possible, they should select a local shop, just in case last minute alterations are needed.

The groom and his men usually wear same attire. To set himself apart, groom may select a different colored tie, vest, pocket square, or boutonniere.

Sometimes groom will present a memorable gift, such as cufflinks, studs or, if he can afford to splurge, monogrammed shirts, to be worn by these men of honor at wedding. Given all that they are expected to do, groom should indeed go out of his way to show his appreciation, even in advance, for a job well done.

© Copyright 2005 Bachcroft.com. Permission to reprint this article, as is, is granted as long as proper attribution (author's biography) is given and all active hyperlinks remain intact.

Include Pleasantries Consider adding a few pleasantries if your receiving line will not be in a house of worship. This will liven up everyone’s mood, get conversations going, and make waiting in line easier for your guests. For instance, you could: Include music—Have band or your dj positioned close enough so that there is music in background. Plan ahead though. You don’t want to have to take time to make these arrangements at last moment. Pass tray—Ask your caterer to set hors d’oeuvres and champagne on a table nearby or have a waiter offer these on a tray.

Receiving Guests Like a Pro

There are always instances where, for one reason or another, a person’s name is not ready to roll off your tongue. You can handle these moments as if you’ve been in receiving lines all your life by saying something like: "I’m so glad you came. (Groom’s name) and I hope you’ll have a wonderful time." Or you could say, "It’s great to see you again. Please say hello to my husband, (Groom’s name)." Or "Thank you so much for coming. (Groom’s name) and I feel lucky to be with so many good friends."

Keeping these simple ideas in mind will help you look and feel like a savvy new bride.

© Copyright 2005 Bachcroft.com. Permission to reprint this article, as is, is granted as long as proper attribution (author's biography) is given and all active hyperlinks remain intact.