3. “Psychological Reactance”: People don’t like to be told they can’t have or can’t do something. It’s related to not wanting to be controlled by others, especially if situation feels unfair or arbitrary. The “reactance” is both emotional and behavioral.

The emotional part is your inner brat saying, “Oh yeah? I can’t have what I want? Just try and stop me!”

The behavioral component is what you do about it, which usually involves some type of rebellious reaction. You see this with teenagers whose parents have forbidden them to date certain people. Reactance also explains why a “Wet Paint” sign always invites unwanted fingerprints on newly painted surface.

Next time you don’t get what you want, ask yourself whether one of above factors has influenced your desire. If so, let go of pursuit. Your inner brat won’t be happy, but ultimately (in words of Rolling Stones,) you “might just find [that] you get what you need.”

Pauline Wallin, Ph.D. is a psychologist in Camp Hill, PA, and author of "Taming Your Inner Brat: A Guide for Transforming Self-defeating Behavior" (Wildcat Canyon Press, 2004)

7. Refresh (or create) your fitness & diet plan. Can you do more exercise outdoors now that winter is ending? Can you eat more fresh fruit and vegetables? Do you want to join a running club or yoga class? Are you really drinking enough water?

8. Update your look- a new hairstyle, different hair color, fresh lipstick or nail polish shade? Change things up a little- it will help you see yourself and world from a slightly different perspective, and you never know what ideas and opportunities await you.

9. Meet new people. Join a book club, get out and network, throw a dinner party and ask your friends to invite friends that you have never met before. Developing and nurturing a strong social network helps manage stress and increases levels of happiness and well-being.

10. Review your goals for year and TAKE ACTION NOW on one that matters to you most. Get a coach, make a plan, enlist help of friends and family, and just get it done. Once you start moving forward, it will be easier than you think and you will wonder why you didn’t start sooner!

Choose at least 3 of these suggestions and make a commitment to take action on them now. After you have decided what you are going to do, plan and schedule when you are going to do it, and make sure that you let at least one other person in on your plan- someone who has permission to give you a little nudge if you get off track. Good luck with your fresh start!