WHEN – “MEN ARE FROM MARS AND WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS” – DOESN’T WORK!Written by Paul Barratt-Hassett
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If there were a clash between like individuals, let’s say two vampires, then interaction creates friction (just as two magnets would repel each other) until one of them gives up their energy and reverts to being either a victim or a sex maniac. Have you ever played with magnets? If you have, you would notice that if you bring two magnets together, like poles will repel each other, as if an invisible force is preventing them from connecting. And if you were to relax one of your hands that magnet would spin around and then they would clamp together. As you know, this is because magnets have a positive and a negative side and these attract each other. The cause of conflict. The same concept exists for human interaction – an invisible force is either forceful towards you or taking from you. To demonstrate this, following is a scenario that typically takes place in relationships. Often, when couples first fall in love, there is a lot of giving and sharing by both partners - giving affection, love and romance; sharing fears, secrets and even everyday events. But for some couples, after a period of time, this giving and sharing stops or slows down. Now focus of attention or energy starts to move from partner in relationship back to oneself. What then happens is a war of energy exchange between couple until one of partners gives up their energy (becomes a victim) and other stays in control (the leader or decision maker) and relationship continues running smoothly. Alternatively, if battle continues and both want to be decision makers, without agreement, things continue to get nasty and being around each other is not so much fun anymore. Forces are about give and take, follower and leader, controlled and controller. Some people like to be lead and guided through life and equally some prefer to be leaders. And in relationships - good ones that is - there is usually one partner who is leader and one who is follower. These types of couples clearly have good working relationships, energy exchange fits, there is no conflict, love is flowing and everyone is happy. Until such time as follower becomes tired, fed up or even bored with being follower; being one who has to sacrifice constantly. What happens then? The conflict of energy exchange begins and this is often when relationships go bad. Fights happen more frequently and love stops flowing, thus energy exchange changes. Often energy drops from love down into anger, hate or regret, and many couples go their separate ways at this point in a relationship. The many faces of love. Paul claims that all three types need love, just in different ways. A sex maniac needs to feel sexual pleasure to feel loved. A victim needs to feel worthy to feel loved. A vampire needs to feel important to feel loved. And with love comes understanding! ************************************************************************************** Resource Box: You have permission to use this article providing; you leave resource box intact, leave entire article unchanged including all links and Authors Details. You must also notify author via email as to where article is being used. Authors Details: E-mail: relatingwell@relatingwell.com Author’s URL: http://www.relatingwell.com Paul along with his partner Elise are running ‘the perfect relationship challenge’ where they are coaching couples, needing help in there relationships, from each major city onto road to better relationships. It is currently a free service and you can enter ‘the perfect relationship challenge’ on line at http://www.relatingwell.com **************************************************************************************
Paul along with his partner Elise are running ‘the perfect relationship challenge’ where they are coaching couples, needing help in there relationships, from each major city onto the road to better relationships. It is currently a free service and you can enter ‘the perfect relationship challenge’ on line at http://www.relatingwell.com
| | Key to Simplicity - The Word 'No'Written by Louise Morganti Kaelin
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Their time is precious, but so is yours. Giving in when someone 'insists' normally puts a strain on relationship. And more often you do it, bigger strain. Say yes when it feels right, and respect their right to say No to you. ANYTHING TO WHICH YES WASN'T YOUR FIRST ANSWER This may be most important one of all. Sometimes we say no, but others are very persuasive or very persistent and we find ourselves saying 'Yes' for a whole bunch of reasons that have nothing to do with topic at hand. Sometimes it's because a 'no' feels like a rejection of person asking, instead of thing they're asking. The possessions or responsibilities we come into this way are guaranteed to oppress us because guilt that made us accept in first place makes it almost impossible to unload these things later. This takes practice, but may be one of best skills you ever develop.
(c) Louise Morganti Kaelin. Louise is a Life Success Coach who partners with individuals who are READY (to live their best life), WILLING (to explore all options) and ABLE (to accept total support). Find many free resources to assist you in living the life of your dreams at http://www.touchpointcoaching.com For her free newsletter of insightful, practical suggestions for creating your best life, email mailto:on-536@ezezine.com
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