Well, it would appear that at last holes are being drilled in ships hull, with a view to its eventual removal sometime this coming autumn. And as I type this, I can hear drilling coming from garage as my new landlord slowly gets my new accommodation finished.

It’s now June and we moved in on February 28th and still he drills away aimlessly, every other week, for a couple of hours and I think I know how that damn ship must feel.

The misery of eviction is bad enough. In my case, a solution has been found. As we waded through flood that had appeared at our new front door on wettest day of year so far, waves listlessly, muddily seeping round front door, at least it’s a roof over family’s head.

And of course there’s white horses. From back of house we have them galloping around doing it all very well and gracefully but come October Tricolor will remember white horses as just a fond and distant memory.

(Never look these gift horses in mouth. I had no idea how to tie this one up but I think that last bit just saved me.

And you.)

These vouchers are redeemable only at their local Tool Liquidators outlet. And what they buy with their vouchers can only be sold to Pentagon.

The Pentagon is already accustomed to paying $600 for hammers. And according to this article I read, they even pay upwards of a couple of thousand dollars for Mr. Coffee coffee makers.

You don't even want to know what they pay for screwdrivers!

So, I figure, those folks with vouchers shop at Tool Liquidators, pay ninety-nine cents for a hammer, and sell it to Pentagon for $600. That's a profit of $599.01 per hammer! Why, it'll take just one trip to tool store and they're quite well off. Poverty's gone.

The beauty of this plan is that it won't cost us taxpayers a penny more to lift everyone out of poverty. We're already footing bill for $600 hammers and who knows what for light bulbs.

(c)2002 by Mark Brennaman. All Rights Reserved.