The Tyranny of the Good Girl, the Good Boy

Written by Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

Continued from page 1

As long as Maria is tuned into to Andrea’s needs and feelings and not aware of her own, she will continue to be invisible to Andrea and others. Maria needs to learn to take allrepparttar consciousness she developed overrepparttar 126149 years regarding others’ feelings and needs and apply that same consciousness to her own feelings and needs. This is a difficult challenge because she has been practicing tuning into others while ignoring herself for her whole life.

I have had this same challenge. It was such a shock to me to discover years ago that, rather than beingrepparttar 126150 loving person I thought I was, I was attempting to control how others felt about me by being “nice”. By putting myself aside and doing what I thought others wanted me to do, and being what I thought others wanted me to be, I was trying to control getting love and approval and avoiding disapproval. The result was that I was anxious around others who were important to me, always fearing that I would say or do something wrong and experiencerepparttar 126151 rejection I so feared.

When I finally realized that being loving meant being loving to myself as well as to others, I turned my eyes inward and started to practice becoming aware of my own feelings and needs. Instead of making others responsible for defining my worth and lovability through their approval, I took onrepparttar 126152 responsibility of defining my own worth and lovability. I developed a strong connection with a spiritual source of love and wisdom, which helped me to seerepparttar 126153 truth of who I really am. I learned to be an advocate for myself, seeing myself and speaking up for my own feelings and needs rather than making others responsible for seeing me.

I am no longer a “good girl” having to do everything right to please others and gain their approval. I am no longer “nice” as a form of manipulation. That’s not to say that being loving to others is not a very high priority - it is. But now I include myself inrepparttar 126154 equation rather than expecting others to love me enough to feel safe, adequate, worthy and lovable.

Maria is also learning to love herself rather than control others. At one point, she wanted to leave both her job and her relationship, but she realized that she would just continuerepparttar 126155 same patterns in another job or relationship. By staying and learning to see and speak up for herself, her relationships with Andrea and her boyfriend are improving.

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?", "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By My Kids?", "Healing Your Aloneness","Inner Bonding", and "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By God?" Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: or

The Hidden Superpowers Of Your Mind

Written by Michael Lee

Continued from page 1

The problem withrepparttar people ofrepparttar 126148 modern world is that they are too preoccupied with worries, anxieties, and negative emotions. As a result, they are adversely affecting their state of health.

White lies have become prevalent nowadays in order to easerepparttar 126149 burdens or to persuade others to do things that they thought are unattainable.

There was once a weightlifter who couldn't lift weights in excess of 300 lbs. So his coach devised a clever idea and told him thatrepparttar 126150 barbell he has to carry weighs only 300 lbs. With all his might,repparttar 126151 weightlifter managed to put it above his head. After he puts it down,repparttar 126152 coach told him that he has just lifted 350 lbs. of weight! It's all inrepparttar 126153 mind!

A famous person once said, "Whenever you think you can or you can't, you're right."

If you think you are poor, then you are; unless you properly condition your thoughts torepparttar 126154 positive mindset. I know it's hard to think rich if your environment is not conducive to such way of thinking. Use your imagination then! Visualize your house to be a mansion, your old car to be a limousine,... Well you getrepparttar 126155 picture.

There is absolutely no limit with whatrepparttar 126156 mind can achieve. But you have to combine belief, will power, and action with positive thinking in order to arrive at your intended destination.

Michael Lee is the author of "How To Be A Red Hot Persuasion Wizard," an ebook that reveals powerful secrets on how to get anything you want, including how to fully improve your relationships, explode your profits, win arguments, and magically influence others. Grab a sample chapter at

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