If you pursue an unrealistic relationship, you will hurt yourself later. You may be disappointed by other person. And it may take you some time to regain your composure.

What do my parents and others say about relationship?

Your friends, or parents may draw your attention to dangers in your relationship. Would it not be wise for you to take a hard look at facts, and pack it up? After all, they have affection for you, and your parents who are older and wiser, should know better.

Will I be able to keep my courtship honorable?

This means that your relationship should not cross from seeing each other, to having premarital sex. So if your date decides to call off relationship, you would still have kept your chastity and moral integrity intact. The reverse is bad news.

The following are rules of dating.

Do not date until you are old enough and ready to get married.

Do not date someone you dont love.

Keep your relationship chaste.

Do not go to your date alone. Have a chaperon by you.

Be properly dressed, and be on time when you visit your date.

Keep your visit informal and relaxed. Converse and listen well.

Try to know as much as possible about your date.

Do not dodge sensitive matters. Discuss them.

In your discussion, find out how you are to live. Ask questions like these: Where are we to live? How many children shall we have? What type of birth control method shall we use? What is your role in our marriage? What type of work shall we do? How are we going to save our money? Do you have any health problem? Did you live a promiscuous sex life? Can we do a medical check up? Are you owing money? What are your life or religious goals? And many more. . .

Spend time with your mate in recreation and working together. Do daily chores like shopping, cooking, cleaning, and washing -- practical things that will help you later in marriage, and see how your mate fares.

Watch to see how your mate treats his parents and friends.

Observe him when in company of other people.

Watch him unobserved.

Do not be hasty in your courtship. If there are flaws in person you are dating or flaws in relationship that you think you cannot live with, break it up.

But now, how do you know that you are ready for marriage?

(To be continued)

Copyright ) 2002, all rights reserved

About Author:

ARTHUR ZULU, is author of best- selling book, HOW TO WRITE A BEST-SELLER. Download your copy and FREE excerpt at : http://www.1stbooks.com/bookview/10975 The above article is taken from a book of same title, and book is for sale. For contacts , mailto : controversialwriter@yahoo.com

Remember, such character repels, and is dangerous to your health.

Do I exercise self control? -- Galatians 5: 19, 20.

One who cannot control his temper is a dangerous person. He can be violent, and may even kill before realizing it. Would you like to marry and end up in jail for murder? -- Ephesians 4: 26.

Questions to ask of your prospective mate.

Lets say he is a male, although some of these questions may well apply to a female. What would you want of your male partner?

Does he have a good reputation? -- Philippines 2: 19: 22.

Yes, way a man is viewed by others, including those under his authority will enable you to know kind of reputation that he has. Unfortunately, most good women marry bad men. -- See 1 Samuel 25: 3, 23  25

Does he have good morals?

Find out if man you intend to marry is pretentious. Perhaps he wants to get you just to satisfy his sexual desires. Such persons think of themselves first. They do not even fear God.

Does he treat me kindly? -- Ephesians 5: 28, 29.

A kind husband would treat his wife in like manner. He trusts and praise his wife; he is not excessively jealous and is moderate in his expectations of her. Would that not be how you want your future husband to treat you?

Does he respect his family members?

Also find out how your prospective mate treats his parents and relatives. If he is rude to his family members, then you should expect trouble from him. But if he is respectful and obedient to his parents, then expect him to treat you lovingly after marriage.

Does he allow anger to control his life?

Many families have been ruined by violence. So if your prospective mate is given to fits of anger, that is a clear indication of danger. A woman who marries such a man will be subject to verbal and physical abuse. Do you call that marriage?

Does he have right goals?

Find out if your future mate has attainable or visionary life goals. For example, does he want to be a millionaire? Will it do him good? Or is it his goal to serve God?

So above questions will help you to scrutinize your mate in order for you to find out if such one has qualities that are needed to make a successful marriage. Try to look beyond wedding day. For you are going to live with this person all days of your life.

But now, how can you have a successful courtship?

(To be continued)

Copyright ) 2002, all rights reserved

About Author:

ARTHUR ZULU, is author of best - selling book, HOW TO WRITE A BEST-SELLER. Download your copy and FREE excerpt at : http://www.1stbooks.com/bookview/10975 The above article is taken from a book of same title, and book is for sale.For contacts, mailto : controversialwriter@yahoo.com