NLP has also been used to help people establish rapport with others in an incredibly short period of time. Rapport is important for one key reason, unless you and person you are trying to influence are in rapport with each other, there will be very little agreement. If other person does not feel comfortable with you, and does not feel that you are 'like them', at least in general ways, that person will not feel good about accepting what you have to say and acting on that information. In short, you will not get what you want from that person.

Okay, so let's assume that you are somewhat familiar with basic ideas of NLP. You know about mirroring other person's body language. You know about speaking in their terms, whether visual, auditory, or kinesthetic. You even know about eye movements and what they refer to. This is only surface of incredible amount of power that a full knowledge of NLP will give you.

Some of more advanced techniques of NLP deal with what is known as pacing and leading. The central idea here is that if you say a number of things that are obviously true, such as we are in a room with 4 walls, that we are sitting at this table talking with each other, and that you are holding a glass of wine, then whatever you say next (which is not so obvious) will seem to be more true than if you did not include obvious facts. Guys, if your girlfriend starts to think that you don't love her, here is your salvation. Simply say a string of obviously true statements right before you tell her you do love her. Repeat this a few times and she will start to believe you.

And this works (to one degree or another) with those you just met. You can use this if you are a salesperson trying to convince prospect that your product is superior to your competition's product. You can use this to convince your boss that you are worth much more than company is paying you. And you can use this to convince that hottie that spending an evening with you will be better than anything else he/she could be doing.

This one concept from science of NLP is priceless! And there is much more. There is a whole segment in NLP on language patterns. There are some patterns which will help you discover exactly what someone means when they say something vague and mysterious. There are language patterns which contain hidden meanings which bypass conscious mind and go straight to subconscious mind (our focus for this article). And there are language patterns that can induce a hypnotic state without a formal induction ritual. Talk about an open door to subconscious mind!

There is so much information, that a brief article such as this one could not cover it all. There are numerous books out on market which explain many of theories of NLP. And if you're good at translating theory into practical application, any of these books will give you greater power in dealing with other people.

Good luck in your persuasion activities!

An example: The feeling-image might be – “The world is a black hole with huge teeth and I am totally alone, powerless and vulnerable. There is no one around to help me and I’m about to be swallowed-up by black hole!” All this in psyche of a very young child.

Beliefs:

From this totally unconscious place in ourselves we create and gather beliefs from world around us to allow us to survive in this horror.

Examples of these might be – “I will only be safe if I build a wall of people around me, to keep out deep sense of isolation and loneliness I feel”. “I must also do whatever it takes to keep people around me, no matter what it costs me physically and emotionally”. “If I’m alone I will die!”

Unfortunately, what also happens is that we create alongside those beliefs, other ones that say such things as ”I don’t deserve to be loved by people around me so they will leave me, and if they don’t, I will make them leave me”. “I don’t want people to get too close to me, because when they abandon me I will feel terrible again”

Behaviours:

We act in such ways as to bring about these outcomes – promiscuous sexual behaviour for example, to make people “want to be with me so I won’t be alone”, but at same time, we choose people who continue to abandon us. Etc. Etc. We have entirely forgotten – we never knew – that we have set this up to happen way it does, so we blame those around us, and world, for what happens to us.

All of this confirms and reinforces what we believe about world and ourselves, in a self-reinforcing loop.

There is hope!

The solution is to bring this deep unconscious “source code” into consciousness, so that we can begin understand why things happen they way they do and so that we can choose consciously nature, content and experience of our lives.

First Aid For The Soul is offered at: www.becomereal.com

www.becomereal.com has more information about this, and offers, if you choose, an evaluation of particular unconscious survival dynamics that you have set up in your life.

It does this through a short series of all-encompassing questions that allows an algorithm (The Universal Generator) to access your particular dynamic in a four-dimensional belief/behaviour “landscape.

It offers simple, but profound, ways for you to move your life back into consciousness.

It also has a unique, direct process that enables you to make decision to change your life.

Years of study and personal research into the underlying nature of existing consciousness traditions and modern consciousness research have gone into the development of the understandings behind this model.

This includes hands-on work in relationship therapy, with relationships of all kinds, families and post-natal depression groups.

I have also written and/or illustrated over 80 early reader children’s books.

ctaylor@becomereal.com