In some cases, it makes sense to avoid lying when you know that truth will be damaging. You must then evaluate your principles. Are your values more important than person you’re helping? However, when your words are meant to conceal truth, or to destroy relationships, or another’s character, it is not a professional behavior.

* DOMINEERING –A feeling of superiority, overbearing, forceful, or showing offensive behavior toward others. Developing a need to dominate or to be accepted based upon your own self-importance is another self-defeating attitude. Professional behavior is never having a need to prove that you are superior to anyone else.

Whenever you depend upon attention of others, or when you develop a need to be noticed, you set yourself up for constant gratification and expectation for approval. How long could you expect someone else to cater to your wishes, without other person losing her/his own self-worth?

* EXAGGERATING – Overstating; embellishing truth, or inflating truth. Nothing is more sacred than integrity of your own mind. There is only one you. Know that you are unique – yet, flaunting it to point of rubbing your uniqueness in someone else’s nose is not a sign of professionalism.

* JUDGING – A way of comparing yourself to others. You are guilty of sitting in judgment of others when you display any of following positions:

1. “I’m more attractive than she is.” 2 “My accomplishments and goals are more important than yours.” 3. “My business is better than one down street.” 4. I can do ____________(Fill in blank) better than anybody else. 5. My house is bigger and more expensive than my co-worker; my business partner, my brother, etc.

When your way of thinking is based on your opinion and is not based on fact or truth, behavior is unprofessional.

Look closely at yourself and your own aspirations, then learn to appreciate fact that your life need not be built upon comparing yourself to others, exaggerating and/or lying to others, or feeling that you’re superior. Instead, with your built-in spiritual nature, make your life one that is pleasing to others, fulfilling to yourself, and – exceedingly professional

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Gerri D Smith publishes and hosts multiple Gateways to inspire, encourage, and support individuals, small business owners, entrepreneurs. An online business resource giving you more ways to reach your personal and financial goals through articles, ongoing contests for cash prizes, and more in a Free Monthly Newsletter. For details, visit: http://www.distinctivebusinesswomen.com Or, email your correct email address to: distinctive2002@excite.com?Suject=SubscribeG

I learned this concept as I debated my boss over a decision he was about to implement. As a Human Resources Director, I was concerned decision would impact morale. HR was filter by which I judged world at time. He gently closed discussion agreeing with my view point, "Yes, it's true employees will be unhappy. But they'll be unhappier if there are layoffs next year. My job is to make sure everyone has a job."

Absolute thinking limits perspective, causes mistakes in judgment, misunderstandings, disappoints, conflicts, and frustration in workplace. Most work issues are not black or white, right or wrong, win or lose. They are varying shades of grey. If you want to be winning at working, you need to adjust your eyes to see more grey and adjust your beliefs to understand, for most part, people are doing what they believe to be right, for reasons they believe are right. If we could stand behind them and see what they see, we might even come to same conclusion.

(c) 2004 Nan S. Russell. All rights reserved.