Written by Rev. James L. Snyder

Continued from page 1

The discouraging aspect of this whole mess is it usually boils down to an either/or kind of situation. Either I chooserepparttar one, or I must chooserepparttar 118125 other.

I don't like this very much. I much rather prefer both, if there's really a choice aboutrepparttar 118126 matter.

This week at Thanksgiving, it all came to a head — mine. The culprit behindrepparttar 118127 whole issue was none other thanrepparttar 118128 Mistress ofrepparttar 118129 Parsonage. Just when I think I have my beloved all figured out, I am forced to go back torepparttar 118130 drawing board and start all over.

The gracious Mistress ofrepparttar 118131 Parsonage, knowing my addiction to theology, posed a query to me. The difficulty expressed itself in a three-fold choice.

I still am a little confused aboutrepparttar 118132 whole thing, but somehow I maneuvered throughrepparttar 118133 theological quagmire.

The Master Chef atrepparttar 118134 parsonage put it to me like this; which do you prefer? A pre-Thanksgiving turkey, a mid-Thanksgiving turkey or a post-Thanksgiving turkey? Her insistence was for me to select one.

To me there is a slice of truth in all three, which is why I staggered atrepparttar 118135 predicament.

What do I really know about things like this? As far as I was concerned, a turkey is a turkey is a turkey.

Moreover, a turkey by any other name is still good eating at Thanksgiving dinner.

My nutritional philosophy is rather simple — don't confuse me with options. Just setrepparttar 118136 blessed thing before me, give me a fork and let me go.

Unlike other years, this year a shortage of turkey threatened our little domicile and my wife was not sure there would be enough to go around. For this reason, she suggested that I, who boughtrepparttar 118137 turkey inrepparttar 118138 first place, should choose.

This isrepparttar 118139 basic difference betweenrepparttar 118140 sexes. Women love to planrepparttar 118141 meals ahead of time and in minute detail. Men just love to eat those meals withoutrepparttar 118142 necessity of any noodle-work.

The biblical adage is my motto: "And they, continuing daily with one accord inrepparttar 118143 temple, and breaking bread from house to house, did eat their meat with gladness and singleness of heart." (Acts 2:46 KJV.)

My philosophical mindset notwithstanding, my companion insisted I choose between roast turkey and turkey salad sandwiches. What a choice.

There are other choices in life far more serious.

Joshua, inrepparttar 118144 Old Testament, understood this. He challengedrepparttar 118145 people of his day to "Choose you this day whom ye will serve." He also included a personal declaration, "As for me and my house, we will serverepparttar 118146 Lord."

I'm with Joshua on this one.

Rev. James L. Snyder is an award winning author and popular columnist living with his wife, Martha in Ocala, FL.

The Inception of Modern Computers, via the Back Passage.

Written by Thick Mick

Continued from page 1

The disc drive was nothing to write home about, so I got a “fan belt” (alligator alimentary canal) and coupled it up to a perfectly squared shoulder blade. I still insist that this isrepparttar way to go! Listen up Mucrosift!!!!

There was no need for a printer, because we couldn’t write anyway. However, I did need a keyboard and quickly dispatched my fathers’ keys torepparttar 118124 pond and used his board!

Cables were easy enough to make and my grandmother (bless her) was an excellent knitter. “When you want to knit a high speed cable, do so, one bit at a time”, she used to tell me (not that I ever listened). I always get that one mixed up withrepparttar 118125 butcher downrepparttar 118126 road. What is it he used to say again?.....”When you want a nice bit of high-speed meat, get them, one bat at a time”.

Electricity, keyboard, processor, hard drive, cables........what else was there?.......oh yeah......I needed a comfortable seat and ordered this overrepparttar 118127 internet. I had to! The 7/11 was closed!

That just about concludes two thousand years of thicknology, as I remember it.


Thick Mick is an expert columnist on historical matters, with The Trivial Times

    <Back to Page 1 © 2005
Terms of Use